


Now There's a Devil on my Shoulder

by TheFlamingo013



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anxiety, Aobajousai Hinata Shouyou, Can't tag the rest cause spoilers, Emotional Manipulation, Hinata wears braces, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Libero Hinata Shouyou, M/M, Multi, Mystery, Seijoh Hinata Shouyou, yahaba's POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 30,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26060431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFlamingo013/pseuds/TheFlamingo013
Summary: In the art of manipulation, the liar is not allowed to have a guilty conscience.or.Yahaba Shigeru faces the consequences of lying to the most genuine person he's ever known.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Yahaba Shigeru, Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 87
Kudos: 151





	1. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He breathes out deeply, expelling the dark thoughts away. It was something Hinata wordlessly taught him. Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yes, this is another AobaJosai Hinata story with more elements to his character that I've added just because XD  
> But this time, it is told from the underdog's point-of-view.  
> For now, this will be a recap chapter where Hinata doesn't transfer... yet but he will soon! And lots of ugly crying!  
> Overall, the genre will focus more on mystery and friendship than of romance. IT'S STILL THERE if you squint hard enough. 
> 
> With that said, enjoy and happy reading~

**_2012, Karasuno High School Gymnasium_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Contrary to popular belief, or to anyone who cares to know, Yahaba Shigeru didn't actually meet Karasuno's #10 on the other side of the court. Or any side of the net to be exact. Not even on any practice or official matches either. For while volleyball was the only perceived link to how they could’ve possibly known each other, there was one particular event that gave Yahaba the impression that Hinata was a force to be reckoned with. 

The dental clinic. 

It was a summer ago before his second year began when he spent his off-practice days working at his father’s office as cleaning personnel. He was merely making good of his break by being helpful to the family business. And getting handsomely paid.

His mornings would usually start off with keeping the floors pristine white and the garbage bin emptied by closing hours. The in-betweens would either be cleaning after a patient or snacking behind the vending machine. It was an unspoken crime to bring anything that had even the tiniest amount of sugar into the threshold, after all. Same old routine with no expectations for it to change until one day, he heard a guttural scream from across his father's operatory.

“What. The. Hell. Was. That?”

Eerily, no one even batted an eye. As if they were used to this.

It was a high shrill but a tone lower enough to differentiate it from a girl's voice. Yahaba felt chills when laughter followed, confirming that his father did indeed have a knack for finding entertainment in his poor, patient’s pain. Then the door opened to reveal a middle age woman with a little girl no older than ten on hand. "Nii-chan was really tough, but he screamed like a girl." She giggled.

Her bright, orange locks subtly reminded Yahaba of daybreak.

The woman, presumably the mother, merely nodded in agreement as they made their way to the check-out counter. 

Now Yahaba wasn't a nosy person. He preferred playing the background character- an underdog even in his own story, but curiosity bested him at that moment. He had seen patients come and go from the office, a lot of them crying as they step foot into the operatory but sullenly quiet after the treatment. So who could’ve possibly been still in pain afterwards? 

Yahaba casually made his way to the operatory and peeked at the mysterious character that caught his attention only to step on a generous splatter of blood on the floor. 

"Shigeru? You can clean up in a while once we get Hinata-kun out of the - SHIGERU!"

He passed out, point blank. 

It was moments later when he woke up on his father's spare couch that he learned of a Hinata Shouyou who got three extractions WITHOUT ANESTHESIA. Yahaba wouldn't have believed it until his father, after laughing at his comical expression, said that it was his second session so it wasn't done consecutively.

"Otherwise that would've been dangerous, even for his high pain tolerance." he explains. "Though that kid is one tough tit. Imagine flat-out choosing removal without anaesthetics because he was scared of the needle. Crazy right?"

"Crazy." Yahaba echoes. He tried to remember what this Hinata looked like by deriving a bit of his appearance from his sister, only to come up with a blur of orange. 

This brings him to his current predicament, in the middle of a practice match between Aoba Josai and Karasuno, as he sees Hinata Shouyou for the second time. Not in a four corners room with linoleum tiles and blood, but from across the court as he serves the ball straight to the back of his teammate's head.

Kunimi and Kindaichi howled in laughter, as did some of Karasuno's players if not louder. And then said teammate, who was probably sporting a concussion, stalked towards Hinata akin to a predator as he continuously hit the spot where the deadly serve took aim. 

"What are you so afraid of?" says Kageyama.

Hinata gulped, as did Yahaba.

Afterwards, they fall into an easy rhythm and while it wasn't a smooth rally, it was enough to take the whole set even at Oikawa's late arrival. Throughout the game with the obvious outcome, Yahaba resigns to watching Hinata. He watches his monstrous jumps take flight, a freak quick done by an unbelievable amount of speed and a very precise toss.

Hinata’s sharp, beryl eyes were closed whenever he spiked and Yahaba, as a setter himself, didn't know if he should be astonished or annoyed or both. 

Astonished that a short middle blocker who ran around the court in a blur of orange _believed in his setter so much_ that he didn't need to look where he was hitting. Annoyed that it was a _selfish move_ that won't improve either of the players. Both because who in the right mind could pull off something as crazy as that?!

"Crazy." Yahaba echoed. 

Crazy as Hinata being more scared of needles and his own teammate (though who could blame him on the latter) than the ~~blood blood blood pooling~~ injuries he attained that could possibly last him a lifetime.

Yahaba saw it in Oikawa's egoistic love for volleyball that ruined his knee, and now he was seeing it in the ginger-haired boy whose smile could rival the sun. It would be a shame when volleyball would eventually extinguish it. 

But he also saw the way Oikawa looked at Hinata, even after the latter almost spiked the ball towards his head, missing a mere millimetre from suffering a concussion. It was from a high toss whereas he didn't need to close his eyes. And when Hinata landed, dark brown and jewelled beryl met. Both were filled with the familiar, insatiable hunger as they greedily drank the sight of each other.

A bit off-putting for Yahaba's taste, too primal and too intimate. But for someone who had the displeasure of seeing this sick sort-of-love develop at first sight between two players more alike than they could’ve ever thought, Yahaba would be lying if he said that he didn't want to stick around and see how it plays out. 

It's just volleyball, after all. 

* * *

**_2012, Miyagi Prefectural Qualifiers_ **

**_Northern Japan_ **

Aoba Josai won against Karasuno by two sets with the final taking the most devastating point from the wing spiker, who failed on the one thing they counted him to do best. And while Seijoh’s cheers echoed throughout the stadium even when they took their victory out for the day, Yahaba stayed. 

He stays for the unfathomable emotions that he couldn't help but _feel_ when he saw Hinata crumble from the other side of the court. It was Aoba Josai’s strong wall that ended the game and Hinata's spike and Kageyama's toss that made Karasuno lose. Now Yahaba wasn't one to kick anyone who was already down, but if he was being honest from a fellow player's point of view, it was that predictable freak quick’s fault.

There was just _too much trust_ in it. Yahaba knew that. Oikawa did too, and mercilessly exploited it. Nevertheless, it was a win with honour. Yet-

Yet what exactly was Yahaba hoping for? To apologize? To be forgiven?

The opposite team, especially Karasuno's #10, did not need his pity. They needed each other to reinvent themselves, to strengthen their defence and ~~learn learn learn~~ Aoba Josai's reserve setter was not needed in that equation.

Besides, he and Hinata weren't even friends! He shouldn't apologize for his team's effort, or be sorry for Hinata. Yet-

Yet he finds Hinata alone within the secluded greenery just around the stadium’s perimeters. It was nearing sundown, no doubt both of their teams finished with their meals and already waiting for them at their respected buses. Yet here they were, juvenile and uncaring, as the muted orange of the sunset reflects Hinata's locks and drowns the fire in Yahaba's tortilla colored eyes. 

"You did -

"I know!" Hinata shouted. "I know I did _terrible_. But I'm going to get better, so prepare yourself. We're not going to lose next time."

Yahaba was shocked, and Hinata's angered expression immediately mimicked his. The latter started to sputter incoherent apologies for being so disrespectful towards a _senpai_ , Yahaba choked at being called as such, and continued to do so until both were reduced into a blushing mess. They couldn't breathe, took a moment to do so, and then stared at each other. 

And laughed. 

They laughed for the absurdity of the situation. Of Hinata's dried tear-stricken face. At Yahaba's gnawing worry for nothing. It's just volleyball, after all. 

"Alright." the reserve setter says. "I look forward to it, Karasuno's #10." 

* * *

They lost. 

They were completely and utterly _destroyed_ , defence broken and their coordination permanently in disarray. Oikawa was on his ruined knee, Iwaizumi's teeth clenched in fury, the mischief that use to twinkle in Matsukawa's gone and Hanamaki looked like he was ready.To.Kill. 

For they lost to Shiratorizawa again. 

Yahaba tried to stay positive, if not for his own crushed pride ~~as Ushijima stared them down with disdain and Oikawa really should've come to Shiratorizawa~~ but for his senpais too. This was their last year, but they still had another shot! Spring Interhigh would just be around the corner and then they'll get their revenge, and then-

And then-

"Shut up." says Yuda, one of the third year reserve players. "Stop spewing bullshit unless you believe in it yourself."

And then Yahaba cries, he was on open crier after all, but not in front of his teammates. He hasn't earned the right to when he couldn't even take a _goddamn point_ with his jump floaters or his pathetic and predictable sets. So he runs as far as his legs could take him until he was beaten with sweat and his lungs burned for air. Subconsciously, he finds himself back to the place where found a considerable amount of solace with one Hinata Shouyou. 

It was stupid. He was being stupid. Karasuno probably went home already after their defeat and Hinata would be _mental_ if he bothered to watch his opponents match live. The very same opponents who made them eat dirt, clip their wings and took their first chance for nationals-

"Yahaba-san?"

He whisked around in shock to find the second subject of his misery a few meters behind him. And since when did Hinata bothered to know his insignificant name? 

They stared at each, neither breaking eye contact nor making sudden movements. And when it was deemed safe ~~safe from what exactly?~~ Hinata took three, long and careful strides to close the gap between them. Yahaba felt his breath hitch now that the tables have turned with him moping around in loss and Hinata there to comfort his pathetic state. 

"You did well." He finishes the sentence that the reserve setter earlier could not. And the dam broke, and he cried. 

"I didn't! I _sucked!_ "

"Your serves were amazing."

"They didn't get through!"

"The jump-floaters were the best."

"It was blocked by that fucking guess monster every time!"

"Your tosses were awesome."

"They were not!"

"They were!"

"WERE NOT!"

"THEY WERE!" Yahaba suddenly felt both of his cheeks sting at the same time. Hinata's small palms, the same ones that hit his setter's tosses with unrelenting force, were planted on both sides of his face as Hinata brings it closer to his.

The reserve setter couldn't tell if he was red from the crying or close contact or both. "Turnip Head-kun missed the first set made by the Grand King, and everything became messy and frustrating from then and BAM! You were called in. Pinch server! Your serve may have been received from the other side of the court, but your presence alone broke the tension amongst your teammates. Kinda like Suga-san when he smiles, but not like Kageyama cause have you seen him? I swear he was planning something."

Yahaba was getting confused with the nicknames thrown around and tried to put two and two to get a clearer image of who and what Hinata was trying to portray. And was he still breathing?

"- and then your toss, THAT TOSS. It was SWISH, slow but precise, and then Seijoh's ace appeared and _slammed_ it across the net!" The sunset behind them was the same one that painted Karasuno's loss and Aoba Josai's win. Now it was both their losses and the colors still haven’t changed. Not for Hinata Shouyou's and Yahaba Shigeru's tears, not even for their laughter. But hey, the situation right now complemented the scenery better.

And so Yahaba laughed, he thinks he's going crazy and was probably scaring the younger player too, but continued to do so until he was in hysterics. Hinata gives him a juvenile pout for the _audacity_ of cutting his volleyball briefing short, yet beamed at the sight anyways.

"Do you usually comfort your enemies like this? That's a bad habit, Hinata-kun." he says after wheezing enough air to talk without feeling the residues of pain. 

Hinata on the other hand, just shrugged. "Or good sportsmanship." 

On cue, both of their phones rang. They were calls from their respective captains asking for their whereabouts. Hinata sputtered for a horribly webbed excuse of skipping out on practice due to a cold ~~and not miles away from Karasuno~~ while Yahaba effortlessly lied that he got lost looking for the restroom.

Neither Sawamura nor Oikawa believed them.

The call drops and both had a punishment of a hundred squats and twenty laps around their school waiting for their return.

* * *

**_2012, Spring Interhigh Qualifiers_ **

**_Northern Japan_ **

It's just volleyball.

Karasuno came back stronger than ever and takes the qualifiers by a storm, by an unassailable murder of crows that mercilessly picked on their enemies until there nothing left but bones. Their team was beyond well-coordinated with their impregnable form of defense and relentless attacks, each so unpredictable that the set was over in a heartbeat.

So it shouldn’t have been a surprise that they won against Aoba Josai AND Shiratorizawa.

It was a battle of concept won. An infamous synchronized attack built on the trust Oikawa once looked down on. And there were no more one-trick ponies or blind spikes for Hinata.

Karasuno cheered, and the rest of the audience who saw and supported the evolution of their play followed. 

On the other hand, Yahaba found himself crying once more for the senpais who will graduate without making it to Nationals. He expected to deal with this alone as everyone will, even after his captain’s speech after their game and the last meal they’ve shared together as a team. But it was just so _hard_ knowing he will still have next year whereas the rest won’t.

~~It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. IT WASN’T FAIR~~

And suddenly, Hinata was there to catch him before he fell into the bottomless pit of his hate.

No jokes, no flattery, no words of comfort or expected laughter followed. Just him, pathetically crying his heart out ~~for being useless useless useless~~ while the ginger-haired player who was supposed to be celebrating his victory held him. 

It was quiet, but not painfully or awkwardly so. Just quiet with the sunset behind them.

For it wasn't really the end of the world, it's just volleyball. 

* * *

**_2013, Miyagi Prefecture_ **

**_Northern Japan_ **

Kyoutani and Yahaba didn't get along swimmingly. Fact.

Yahaba and Hinata meet on random occasions. Also fact.

It was three in the morning and Yahaba couldn't sleep as the memory of Seijoh's Graduation Ceremony kept replaying in his head- a bright day for a gloomy occasion as they’ve said their goodbyes one last time to the senior players of Aoba Josai.

Oikawa states that their departure won't mark the end of Aoba Josai’s reign for the formidable blue castle was there to stay with a new king on their stead.

He hands Yahaba his mantle.

"But this-?!"

"-Is now yours." says Oikawa, and the jacket felt heavier on Yahaba's clutches. It was tradition, like many other teams before them, to pass the tracksuit jacket of the previous captain to the next. For something that looks at least decades old and has been customized several times, the jacket was still in good condition- pristine white and the turquoise lettering of AOBA JOSAI VOLLEYBALL CLUB in bold print. And now it was in the clammy hands of one Yahaba Shigeru.

"I- I can't possibly accept it! I'm not good enough!"

It was Iwaizumi who responds with a flick on his forehead. And boy did that hurt. "He chose you for a reason. Figure _that_ one out."

But the problem was; Yahaba didn't know what _that_ was. And suddenly it was only days away before he arranges their first official match as the new captain. He should be elated. Ecstatic even! Yet all he feels is the suffocating pressure of _you’re never going to be good enough-_

He breathes out deeply, expelling the dark thoughts away. It was something Hinata wordlessly taught him. Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead.

Then he chuckles at the thought of wishing for the ginger-haired player to be here right now _just because_. A selfish thought because they weren't really friends. Because friends know each other’s likes and dislikes, do hangouts like eat and shop together. Maybe even play volleyball on the same side of the court. And how nice would it be to actually toss to Hinata _because no matter how sloppy his sets were, he'll certainly be there to spike it-_

He breathes, kicks his covers off, gets up and changes into a clean tracksuit for a morning jog. 

Now Yahaba expected to have a quick run around the neighbourhood and back to his house before his parents woke up. It would end terribly if he gets caught and get grounded before he could officiate his first meeting as the new captain. A part of him wailed, and the other half thought it wouldn't be so bad.

What he didn't expect was to see Hinata Shouyou sitting at the corner street of a 24/7 Konbini just three blocks away from Yahaba's house. 

"We really have to stop meeting like this." he chuckles and Hinata jolts into a fighting stance. Jewelled, beryl eyes softened upon recognition and he drops his defensive form. "Yahaba-san?"

It was three, or maybe it was four thirty in the morning already, when the two found themselves sitting in an empty parking lot with coffee and milk in hand. Yahaba with coffee, black without sugar and cream ~~to look more mature~~ and Hinata with warm milk cause Kageyama told him that it could help with his miniature built he calls height.

They took one, large gulp before they sputtered in disgust at the same time. 

"Gross!" Hinata spat, muttering profanities under his breath. This catches the reserve setter off-guard. Since when did Hinata sunshine-incarnate Shouyou curse?

Then he goes off in an unfiltered rant. “-you should've heard him and Stingyshima going on and about their freakishly tall ass. As if it's my damn fault I don't grow 2 centimetres a week!"

"Yet you diligently drink milk every day."

"That’s-" both eyes widened in realization. "You've noticed."

Yahaba was too sleep-deprived to deny it. "I notice everything you do."

They were quiet for a while with the older of the two looking at the black swirls of his coffee and the other lost in thoughts.

“… then did you notice _it_?” His voice was soft but it carried the weight of a storm. “That back at nationals, I had a fever?”

Yahaba reluctantly nods and all hell broke loose. 

"It was my fault that we lost."

"Don't be conceited."

"I should've taken care of myself more."

"You couldn't have known."

"I had a _raging fever_. How is that possible to miss?"

The reserve setter wanted to retort that a lot of good players would’ve missed it too when their concentration was focused on winning the game set right in front of them. And it was normal! For Oikawa himself didn't notice his knee getting bad until it was too late, or when Ushijima's wrist burned after ten consecutive power spikes or the slight falter in Hoshiumi's jump when executed one too many times. Even the greatest in Japan falls at least once or twice in their life, the only difference was how they pick themselves up afterwards.

But then again Yahaba knew they weren't his story to tell. So instead he says "Then don't miss it next time."

" _Next time_ , my senpais won't be there. Captain, Suga-san, Asahi-san and Shimizu-senpai they're-" he starts to sob. "They never got to- God, I am so sorry-

"DON'T APOLOGIZE!"

Kyoutani and Yahaba didn't get along swimmingly. Fact. 

Kyoutani was the only player who managed to provoke Yahaba from a brink of a screaming match to the worst physical fight in Aoba Josai’s gymnasium. Ever since then, Yahaba vowed never to yell at anyone ever again. Fact. 

Until now. 

"BECAUSE I WON'T!" he was crying too. God, what is it with Hinata and the sun behind them and crying? "I won't apologize for beating your team before so my senpais could advance to Interhigh Nationals, even though we lost. So don't apologize for playing until your body gave out. Only then I won't apologize for taking Oikawa-san's jersey."

"H-his jersey?"

There was an unmistakable hint of envy laced in his voice but Yahaba was too caught up in admitting his insecurity aloud to question it. "I was promoted to Captain yesterday." 

Hinata’s demeanour immediately changed from self-loathing and envious to _just happy for someone_ as he squeals and threw his arms around the brunet. Yahaba drops his coffee and Hinata’s milk bottle thrown at their back. Oddly, he found it more reassuring than congratulatory gestures exchanged at Aoba Josai gymnasium. "Congratulations Yaha- Captain!"

"I’m not your captain, brat! And show some respect to your elders!"

Yahaba pulls at the other’s hair and realizes why everyone liked to ruffle his orange locks once in a while - it was soft as a bunny's fur. And he didn't even like the fuzzy rodents. 

"But I don't think I'm good enough. I don't think I'll _ever_ be good enough. Iwaizumi-senpai said that I was chosen for _a reason_ and I can't figure out what cause what else am I good for aside from bench warming and shitty tosses-?" he felt both of his cheeks sting at the same time, his self-loathing silenced with Hinata's eyes on his. This was a familiar gesture done one too many times to cut him off when he was reduced into this hateful mess. He breathes. "I don't know what I'm doing."

"Finding out why he chose you shouldn't be a problem. You should just be happy that he did."

"It's not that simple! You don't understand-

"You're right, _I don't_. But you trust the Grand King, right?"

"With my life." He answers in a heartbeat and Hinata beams. 

"Then trust in his decision. Trust that he chose you."

* * *

It was only when they were running home for their lives that Yahaba realized just how manipulative Hinata can be. _He_ was supposed to be comforting the ginger-haired player and his devastating loss at Nationals yet Hinata have once again, managed to turn the tables on him.

Hinata was like the sun, warm and kind as he melts Yahaba’s insecurities away until he was able to breathe just fine.

Next time he was going to return the favour, as they were bound to run into each other again anyways. 

* * *

Yahaba gets home at exactly seven thirteen in the morning where the sun was shining on his hair and fury burning in his mother's eyes. As it turned out, one should _definitely not_ climb their parent's rose arbour to sneak back into their room. His mother takes deadly aim with a huge gardening scissors, missing his head by a few millimetres, and his father unfazed by the scene. 

"You could've taken the ladder, son." he says. 

They discuss his punishment over hot pancakes and coffee. That yes, he was out on a _very_ early jog and he wasn't doing drugs behind a vending machine. The red of his eyes and cheeks were from the burn of running non-stop ~~and not flat-out bawling at Hinata~~. And no, he didn't meet up with any of his senpais from their club. They've just graduated yesterday and had more pressing concerns than a worried mother hounding them for allegedly taking her son out at night. And no, it wasn't a girlfriend either as much as he wished it was. 

"It's Hinata! Hi-na-ta! That human tangerine who happened to be your anaesthesia-refusing patient last year." 

His father's eyes, the same tortilla-colored orbs they share, twinkled in recognition. "You're friends with Hinata-kun? Perfect timing! Could you pass him a message along the next time you see him? Tell him that his next appointment due in two weeks." the breakfast conversation was over with the verdict to replant his mother’s poor roses over the weekend and their topic shifted to his somewhat-friend, Hinata Shouyou.

Hinata, who has a lot of friends ranging from the introverted Kozume to the hyperactive Bokuto, was now Yahaba’s friend too ~~though he was certain he'd barely made Hinata’s list yet, let alone his top ten.~~

His mother not-so-subtly perked in interest as she had been worried that Yahaba's friends' were only from club. Even if Hinata was also involved in volleyball, it was nice knowing her son made a friend from a more outer circle of it. 

"But of course he's _also_ a volleyball player. Those injuries would've gotten there without small accidents." His mother tut as she pours herself a cup of black coffee. Yahaba's nose wrinkles in disgust at the overpowering smell of caffeine. "Hinata-kun must be a very clumsy child. Bless his poor mother's heart."

"Injuries?" Yahaba pushes the cup of coffee away from his reach. 

His father nods. "The broken molars I had previously extracted were horribly chipped. It’s a shame as he didn’t even have that much cavities to begin with."

"Well he does like his face receives." Yahaba thinks about the countless times the ginger-haired player caught the ball with his cheek, deliberately avoiding his nose for the sake of not getting benched. "Alright, I'll let him know if we see each other."

"You better." a small, rectangular box was thrown to Yahaba's way. It was a new phone. 

"This-?!"

"Congrats on making it to captain this year, Shigeru." 

Tears welled up his eyes that completely washed his anxiety away as it rolls down his cheeks. He couldn't wait to let Hinata know.

If only he had his number.

* * *

**_2016, somewhere in Miyagi Prefecture_ **

**_Cliff side_ ** ****

Yahaba watches the sunrise with dead, tired eyes. The warm glow washes the cold off his skin and drowns the residues of last night's events.

"We have to go." He says. 

His voice was soft but callous enough to earn an icy glare from Iwaizumi as he holds onto Oikawa- Oikawa who once was the valiant captain Yahaba looked up to, was now reduced to a sobbing mess sputtering incoherent pleas as he tightly clutches onto the blood- stained, #10 turquoise jersey.

Hinata Shouyou's jersey.

He sighs, turning his gaze back to the source where the myriad of warm colours blended. Everything in Miyagi, from the cold morning chill to daybreak and sunsets reminded him so much of Hinata. And painfully so.

Then Yahaba exhales deeply. _Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead._ Just like how the ginger-haired libero taught him to.

And he pushes Hinata’s bike down the cliff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yahaba in the middle of the story: I have a feeling that this is a start of a beautiful friendship.  
> Yahaba at the end of the chapter: *Bloodied*
> 
> So alot of things don't make sense yet, but they will soon~  
> Next update: Aug. 31


	2. The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only he wasn’t blinded by the selfish desire to win and consumed by the hungry notion to prove himself in front of a hundred insignificant faces in the name of fucking volleyball then Hinata would still be here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY FOR EARLY UPDATE! DOUBLE YAY FOR BROMANCE
> 
> And hello dear readers, welcome to chapter 2 where AobaJosai Hinata begins.  
> But before that, I would like to address something as it might take a confusing turn if not noticed well. Originally I've set the story dates in chronological order but chapter 2 takes the case where a 2016 timeline has been written in between so watch out for that one~
> 
> With that said, Happy Reading!

**_2013,_ ** _**Miyagi Prefecture,** _

_**Northern Japan** _

Yahaba could count the number of times he had witnessed something _so unbelievable_ that he wounds up a deer-in-headlights with mouth awed and his feet glued to the ground. Most of them were the service aces done by the one and only Oikawa Tooru, but who could blame him? His ex-captain did a number on their opponents during his time in Aoba Josai. The rest however, was the unpredictable force named Hinata Shouyou.

From his monstrous high jumps to the evolution of his aerial play, Yahaba was mesmerized through it all. 

But _this_ , this situation whereas Hinata was just a road across him as the speeding car steers into his direction, was an entirely different case. And Yahaba was eternally grateful that he wasn’t struck by a still-motion spell for there was no agonizingly slow movement or breathtaking views, just the fast-forward shift as Yahaba _wills his legs to leap_ , and an arm outstretched desperately reaching for the sun-

“SHOUYOU!!!”

And that’s the thing about the sun, much like the infamous story of Icarus. One must take heed to keep their distance otherwise, be risk being scourged alive.

* * *

**_2016,_ ** _**Miyagi Forestry Reserve** _

_**Northern Japan** _

The search party for Hinata Shouyou commenced at exactly six in the morning at the crack of daybreak. From an outsider’s point-of-view it was merely a futile attempt caused by impatience and wasted on somebody who obviously did not want to be found. A baseless anticipation for those who refused to accept the reality of their circumstances that the ginger-haired player was most likely dead.

To Hinata’s family and his large circle of friends however, it was a silver lining of hope.

Hope that maybe six days ago after winning the Spring Tournament Nationals for the first time in Aoba Josai Volleyball history, Hinata wouldn’t have any reason to have allegedly committed suicide. He was already in his third year, one of the best ranked libero player in Japan, dating the man of his dreams and off to a good university to pursue his goal of going pro. Hinata Shouyou had everything! So it was too much a contradiction for someone who has it all to callously throw it away.

But then again, the series of events were too much a fit for someone planning to take their own life. For depression wears no face and Hinata sunshine-incarnate Shouyou apparently wore his heart on his sleeves.

No one suspected a single thing for that night, _that dreadful night_ with too much alcohol served in the party, Hinata wore his brightest smile. The night before everything went downhill, the night of his disappearance.

The only confirmation of the alleged suicide was the letters everyone started to receive on completely random dates. It wasn’t in chronological order, or in any arrangement that made sense. Yahaba received his letter first before turning it over to the police, followed by Hinata Natsu, Izumi Yukitaka, and then Bokuto Koutarou. 

All the same the letters were written in a similar content that spoke of love, gratitude and the _do your best in life!_ talk. Only Hinata could pull something dreadful to radiated of fondness and warmth as if he wasn’t writing out his death, but an affectionate greeting and a soft farewell instead. Either way, it broke their hearts.

Each was an enthusiastic phrase that was read in Hinata’s cheerful tone but they were also paragraphs centered only to the receiver and no truth omitted from the sender. Others, like Kageyama or Kunimi, has yet to receive their letters but the rest such as Tsukishima or Kindaichi wished they never did. For it was already painful knowing that the last time they saw him, they’ve said words that they could never take back.

And they never will. For Hinata was gone.

Yahaba sighs, one hand combed through his sweat-slicked bangs behind his head and the other pressing on his aching hips. They’ve been trekking the forestry for three hours now, non-stop, and not a single sign ~~dead body~~ of Hinata.

The anxiety of never knowing Hinata’s fate, be it dead or alive, provided no comfort for the ex-captain of Aoba Josai. And a hint of annoyance as he could _very much feel_ the cobalt-colored eyes boring into the back of his head.

Of course Kageyama would be jealous that his ~~best friend~~ rival would rather send a letter to Yahaba first. But as far as he was concerned, Kageyama’s care has always been exclusive to volleyball-related matters only. 

Fortunately he didn’t need to do anything about it as Kindaichi threw a sucker punch at raven head. It was a short, heated second when the fight between their batch mates broke out and Yahaba _did absolutely nothing_ to stop it. Even when the scuffle grew bigger as Yachi Hitoka, his former crush and one of the previous managers of Karasuno, cried out. “This isn’t helping Hinata-kun at all!”

Yahaba wanted to commemorate her courage but her voice was drowned out by the many accusations thrown around the air and the fists exchanged that followed.

~~Oikawa’s name was mentioned along the lines and he suspected that was the fuel to the fire.~~

Amongst the shocked spectators was the uninterested Yahaba who knew that it was bound to happen anyways. It was a score that wasn’t settled during the Interhigh Qualifiers after all. And boy did he take pleasure at the satisfying sight of purple bruising Kageyama’s cheek or the cut on his lower lip.

‘How does it feel?’ Yahaba seethes, but froze when their eyes met. As if Kageyama had read his mind.

“I know what you did.” He mouthed.

* * *

_**2013, Yahaba Household** _

_**Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan** _

He wakes as the sound of Hinata’s name is _ripped_ from the back of his throat.

Immediately, he is seated upright by an accompanying arm as he wheezes and desperately gasps for air. The room was cold and pitch-black ~~as dark as the road when Hinata was~~ as daybreak was still hours-long away, but it was also filled with enough sounds of the familiar reassurance that Yahaba had grown attached to.

“It’s going to be okay. I’m here.”

Hinata Shouyou, the subject of his second misery and the sun that quells the dark pits of his insecurities, sat on the opposite side of Yahaba’s bed as he rubs lazy circles around his back. A new territory of kinship to them, from Hinata’s bike parked at Yahaba’s front yard to letting him bathe in his adjoined T&B.

The extra toiletries, borrowed clothes ~~Hinata surprisingly looked good in turquoise~~ and warm meals under the same roof was enough reason for Oikawa to murder him in his sleep and get away for committing a crime of passion. 

“Thank you.” He rasps, greedily drinking the glass of water the ginger head offered. Hinata always had a cup prepared by the nightstand accompanied with two pills of aspirin. Yahaba doesn’t always take them, worried that he’ll be too reliant on the medicine and unable to conquer the bothersome nightmares that ate his sleep away-

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.”

Jewelled, beryl eyes were down casted but even at the dimness of the room Yahaba could tell that they were misty. He sighs, gently places his hands on Hinata’s orange locks, and ruffles it. “It’s not your fault.” For it really wasn’t, even if it’s ironically Yahaba who suffers the repercussions of having that dreadful memory burned at the back of his mind instead of Hinata being shaken from the near-death experience. 

The exhaustion eventually returns and they fall into an easy rhythm of sleeping on the same bed with their backs facing each other.

Come morning, Hinata would leave for good.

It was a one-week arrangement good for the summer break, ~~though Yahaba’s parents were determined to keep Hinata in their household longer~~ , when he found the ginger-haired player miles away from his home in an abandoned route where Yahaba rarely took a shortcut to. And boy, he was glad he did that day as no one would’ve grabbed Hinata before it was too late.

A speeding truck on a clammy road with barely any lights would’ve made Hinata Shouyou just another number in the statistics of an unfortunate hit-and-run. The thought will forever haunt him in his waking hours and restless dreams. 

At the cost of a sprained ankle, Yahaba carried the ginger-haired player on his back and ~~ordered~~ insisted he stays with him for the night. His parents insisted he stays _forever_ , having liked Hinata’s presence more than a passing guest, as if they’ve known him all their lives. And Yahaba couldn’t really hold it against them - with Hinata’s persistence to help with his mother’s cooking and gardening or laughing at his father’s god-awful jokes. They were an okay family to begin with but the new addition just made the house livelier.

~~So he turns a blind eye when he caught the ginger-haired boy flush his painkillers down the drain.~~

Hinata tells him that he fought with one of his teammates and ended up saying words that can’t easily be taken back or apologized for. Yahaba suspected that it was probably Karasuno’s tyrant setter and vowed to make him sorry the next time they meet in court. For it wasn’t the first time they had an argument, won’t be the last either, but whatever happened _was enough_ to drive Hinata to the brink of getting lost and almost caught up in an accident-

And well, Yahaba was a lot of things but forgiving wasn’t one of them.

So on the seventh and last day of their unexpected set-up, Yahaba invites Hinata to practice with Aoba Josai.

“So you wouldn’t feel like you’ve missed out training for the break.” The setter brushes the residues of his sleep away with mischief. Truthfully, he just wasn’t feeling _generous_ to give Hinata back to Karasuno anytime soon. “Plus, you don’t look _too awful_ in blue.”

The ginger-haired boy pouts, arms crossed haughtily and stance unrelenting to consider the offer. But Yahaba wasn’t even close to being intimidated as Hinata’s appearance was too comical for him to be taken seriously. The middle blocker wore an overgrown teal shirt from Yahaba’s junior school days that covered the expanse of his lithe frame down to his legs and it looked like the sweatpants weren’t even needed.

He secretly snaps a photo of it.

“Fine.” Hinata agrees over waffles, bacon and orange juice. Yahaba even puts out the strawberry daifuku he’s been saving to seal the deal. “But you can’t let my team know. The last thing I need is to be accused of a traitor.”

The older of the two of course, doesn’t take it seriously. “It’s just volleyball.”

* * *

_**2013, Seijoh High Gymnasium** _

_**Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan** _

Hinata Shouyou was breath of fresh air when his insecurities start to suffocate him. So it was only fair that when given the opportunity, Yahaba would do the same. Be a shoulder to lean on, a pillar of support. 

Albeit a risky move on his part as a captain ~~as if Oikawa didn’t use his position for his own benefit before~~ , but it was a gamble he was willing to take.

A quick message to Coah Mizoguchi and a bus trip to Seijoh later, he and Hinata stood at the entrance of the gymnasium and were met with more surprise than the expected hostility. It was Hinata’s powerful spike that claimed their chances of going to Spring Nationals after all. But it seems that outside the court he was just this somebody who gravitates everything and everyone around him _just because_.

And then the situation made an absolutely hilarious turn as it took a few genuine compliments, accompanied by eyes wide filled with wonder and curiosity that reduced the entire line of starting players into a bashful, hot mess. Even Kyoutani wasn’t spared from the sunshine incarnate.

“It’s like you bought him here to inflate their egos or something.” Coach Mizoguchi was exasperated. 

As it turned out, Kunimi and Kindaichi were already familiar with Hinata. They were roughly the same age, had a mutual friend ~~?~~ named Kageyama Tobio and had thoroughly bonded on the three-day training camp Hinata snuck into-

“You did WHAT?!” Yahaba’s voice echoed throughout the entire stadium but Hinata was clearly not sorry, if not proud. The lengths these volleyball idiots went through was beyond Yahaba’s understanding. 

Said bond proved to go much deeper during a three-on-three between the white team comprising of Yahaba, Kyoutani and Hinata versus the blue team with Kindaichi, Kunimi and Watari. ~~They exchanged the latter ones due to Yahaba’s pettiness and desire to play with the ginger-haired middle blocker.~~

Inside the court Hinata was fire. Pure, unadulterated blazing wildfire that ignited the burning fury inside the people around him. He was a treated a rival, _a threat_ first and a friend second, just how Hinata liked it.

The middle blocker licked his lower lip and held his stance at the back of their row. A familiar look on Yahaba’s case. Hungry and insatiable.

The whistle blew and the rally began with Yahaba’s serve and Watari on his knees to save the ball from curbing.

The purpose of the first set was to assess what improved and what could still be done better. And as captain, Yahaba could never get used to being called as such, he had to play while thoroughly observing his teammates. This was most that he could do for now as the tryouts for the new members were only allowed at start of the school year.

Watari Shinji’s movements were more fluid, more relaxed yet controlled. A huge mark up from his infamous back sets. Yahaba suspected long ago that he would’ve been a better setter than he was to which Watari shrugged off. He claimed that he was happy fighting on ground levels and giving their team that _one more chance_.

But he was also a third year now and being the sole libero of Aoba Josai meant he had to look for a successor. Yahaba wishes him luck.

“One touch!” Kunimi and Kindaichi’s two-man blocked was a new one, for they can no longer rely on a mix with one of their previous senpais. Kyoutani was the only current middle blocker in their team and they had yet to coordinate. Individually as wing spikers, they had their own strength cultivated by the difference of how they use their tempos. But their team play has definitely improved.

Yahaba muses that the three-day training exclusive camp did them wonders.

~~And with Hinata on the opposite side of the court, they thrived to show off harder. Couch Mizoguchi wanted to throw the towel in.~~

On the fifth rally, Watari receives the ball with ease and returns it to other side of the court. Yahaba takes this chance and sprints across Kyoutani’s space to perform a back set. Surprisingly, the renowned mad dog didn’t sneer or take offense, instead, _waited for his signal,_ the signal to toss to him. In a brief moment of commentary, the setter begrudgingly acknowledges Kyoutani wins for the most improved.

The bleached-haired middle blocker was no longer thinking with his fist first but waiting, waiting for somebody to plot his next attack and Yahaba knows he definitely won’t disappoint. He has yet to see Kyoutani’s new spikes or back attacks as the shorter player made good of their defense at the moment but it was definitely a mark-up from wreaking havoc on their side of the court. 

Unfortunately, Hinata was there and Yahaba makes a high, open toss from the back. He and Kyoutani will have a year to play together but with Hinata, this might be the only chance he could ever do so with him. And it was one he was ~~longing~~ willing to take.

Hinata jumps, no, _flies_. And everyone held their breath.

There were times the setter couldn’t decide what word to use when it came to describing Hinata Shouyou, be it the sun or Icarus. The embodiment of the flaring star suited him in the occasions of how warm he could be as he flashes that smile that could melt the cold ache in their bones. And that was indeed, a fact.

However, there were occasions where he wasn’t the sunshine-incarnate they made him out to be. Sometimes he was just human- ambitious, greedy, frustrated and angry. Sometimes he was Icarus, flying onwards the great heights without fear. 

Hinata _slams_ the ball onto the other side and they earn a point. Yahaba felt the bubble of joy rising from the pit of his stomach for _just a mere second_ before it was quelled into fear. For the middle blocker didn’t land on his feet, but on his knees.

~~He fell. Fell. Fell.~~

Hinata was on the floor, clutching his left knee as he bites the sobs back that threatened to escape his lips. The ball was forgotten at the back of the court.

* * *

For once, Yahaba is grateful that his ex-captain has already left campus and into the unknown. Preferably continents and oceans away because Oikawa would’ve really murdered Yahaba in cold blood for not only housing _his crush_ for an entire week, but carrying him on his back twice.

Not that it was a pleasant experience on both occasions. Hinata was heavier than he looked and was stinky and sweaty from practice. If anything, Yahaba was the victim here.

“I’m sorry.” Hinata murmured into the back of Yahaba’s collar and he felt guilt.

“You should be.” says Yahaba as they enter the school clinic. Thankfully it was open for the school athletes exclusively on practice days. “I thought we’re taking care of our bodies this year?”

The shorter of the two pouts as Yahaba settles him into the spare bed. “I- I know that! But it’s so frustrating siting around and doing nothing.”

“Resting is not ‘not doing anything’ you brat.” He takes an ice bag from the mini-freezer and presses it onto Hinata’s bruised knee without precaution. The middle blocker hissed, and Yahaba almost felt sorry for him. _Almost._ “Does it hurt?” Hinata nods. “Good, remember that pain the next time you decide to overdo it.”

Hinata mutters something under his breath, and unfortunately for him the other _heard_. Yahaba was good with reading lips as much as he was with forgery. Some quirks he picked up upon the careful observation of the previous Aoba Josai captain when it came to getting what he wanted.

“… what?”

“It’s nothing!”

“The hell it is!”

This was normal. They were friends. Fighting was normal. ~~Kageyama or Kyoutani were the only exemptions because they were anything but.~~ But Hinata admitting to a permanent knee injury? Definitely not normal.

“How long?”

He hated it when the middle blocker cried, more so if he was the apparent cause. “I found out when they took me to the hospital during Nationals. T-the doctor who examined me noticed the bruising and did an x-ray.”

“And how bad is it?”

“… bad enough that they recommended me to stop jumping.”

Yahaba hissed. “Christ, you should’ve told me! Is this what you and your teammate was fighting about? Not being able to play anymore?” Hinata furiously shook his head, determined to protect whoever the hell chased him out all the way to Yahaba’s house. “Hinata-kun I’m sor-

“DON’T APOLOGIZE!”

Yahaba swallows his apology upon recognizing Hinata’s familiar choice of words.

“Don’t apologize for bringing me here, for tossing to me!” the middle blocker’s face was blotched red. “I needed that. I needed _to feel normal_ again. So please, don’t be sorry.”

The room became quiet save for the soft buzzing sounds coming from the AC and Hinata’s muffled sobs. Yahaba breathes, tries not to let the four white walls of the room corners or his friend’s misery suffocate him, and ponder on the appropriate thing to say at that moment.

What would Oikawa do? Or rather, what did Iwaizumi do when he was faced with the idea of his best friend and his ruined knee?

He thinks about it a longer than expected, which sent Hinata some obvious mixed signals as he prepared to take his leave. “Wait! What if there’s another way?”

The middle blocker halts from the doorway, turns his back and arches an eyebrow at him.

“You want to keep playing volleyball, right? What if I tell you that there’s another way for you to stay in court without having to give out your knee?”

* * *

_**2013, Seijoh High** _

_**Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan** _

Summer was long over, as was Hinata Shouyou’s stay in Karasuno or his position as a middle blocker. The next volleyball season will have to do without the greatest decoy or the little giant in the making. Without the other half of the freak duo. Without Hinata in black and orange amongst a murder of crows. 

Yahaba has always reminded himself that it’s just volleyball and it was only fun when you’re winning. Yet playing with Hinata wasn’t just volleyball but a conquest that ignites a sweet burn into your being. It gave him a taste of sweet victory and the exhilarated feeling when given the chance to catch that _glimpse_ on the other side of the court. 

It wasn’t just volleyball anymore. It was paradise.

And upon seeing the dedication both Oikawa and Hinata had tragically aligned themselves into for the price of staying in court made him inwardly rectify his conceited way of thinking.

He, who didn’t have a knee injury, could play to his heart content. He, and his half-assed plays and presence that was insulting to the passionate players who stood in front of him. He, who was an epitome of mediocrity. A reminder of wasted luck. 

So he chose to believe in what Oikawa saw in him, whatever that was. 

Now as a third-year student burdened with the role of captaincy, Yahaba Shigeru was fueled with determination to take back the win that rightfully belonged to their blue castle. To Aoba Josai.

Summer was long over and he and Hinata outgrew of their jerseys.

“Tryouts! Tryouts for the volleyball club start today!” Watari, ever the supportive person he was, volunteered to help with the recruitment from the crowd of new students as they flood the entrance of Seijoh High. It was apparent that not making it to Nationals twice took a hard blow on the early scouting of junior volleyball players and they had Karasuno to thank for that.

And then Hinata ~~finally~~ made his way to their booth, wearing their uniform like a second skin. A good look on him, Yahaba musses, from the pristine blazer and checkered brown pants to the slight undercut in his new hairstyle and braces ~~\- and since when did a trail of uncomfortably fitted metal on your teeth was considered aesthetics?~~

“H-Hey.” He fumbled with his words, no doubt still not used to his braces. Watari loses all semblance of his cool and flat-out _gawked_ at him while Yahaba takes a picture.

If Seijoh did his appearance wonders, how much more would it be in a #10 turquoise jersey?

Hinata hands them a crumpled, volleyball club application form. No doubt it has been held and written over so many times. Amongst the lists of his details from his phone number, new house address and medical history was a note that Hinata was indeed, vying for the position of libero.

Watari passes out, point blank. 

* * *

It was later that night when Yahaba laid in bed while tossing a volleyball back and forth until his fingers bled that he realized just how little did the guilt bothered him nowadays. While his crippling anxiety was kept at bay by the mere presence of his ginger-haired friend, behind closed doors was a certain demon he expected to deal with alone, yet he was surprisingly _unaffected._

Was it because he was high off the thought of what he gambled to win for Nationals this year?

His new phone rings, the one he has kept privy to everyone else, save for one contact. He was determined not to use it until he had proven himself a good captain like Oikawa was but with Hinata, he was always an exception.

It pings once, a message notified, then twice and Yahaba chuckles. Despite the distance and layers of signals between them, he could definitely picture the ginger-haired player flustered on his end of the line.

The first message was composed with a semi-formal greeting laced with random characters and ill-fitted emojis. The second was done in haste, because of course, Hinata _deliberately forgot_ to introduce himself. It was so rushed that Yahaba could feel the Hinata saving himself from the humiliation of being labeled a creep and that he got the number with okay circumstances. Whatever that meant.

**Hinata Shouyou. 22: 18 pm.**

-Have a goodnight, Oikawa-san.

He didn’t feel an ounce of guilt bubbling from the pit of his stomach but the thrill, a reminder that the gamble has begun. He was high-off the adrenaline of putting so much at risk be it his new profound friendship and Oikawa’s trust, for the sake of acquiring the chance to win at Nationals. And that chance was Hinata Shouyou. With him, it was go big or go home.

“All according to plan.” Yahaba says to himself before drifting to sleep.

* * *

**_2016,_ ** _**Miyagi Forestry Reserve** _

_**Northern Japan** _

The fight lasted for a short minute before it was broken up by the Shiratorizawa and Fukurodani alumni. It took Ushijima and Tendou in tandem to hold Kageyama back while Sugawara stared Tanaka, Tsukishima and ~~surprisingly~~ Yamaguchi down in utter disappointment that they haven't moved an inch from the very ground they were kneeling in.

At a safe distance across them was Yahaba’s side which consisted of Hanamaki’s hand on Kindaichi’s shoulder, daring him to pick up where he left off to while Matsukawa watches over the shaken Kunimi and ~~how was he in the worst state amongst them when he didn’t even start the fight?~~ Kyoutani. The absence of the other two former Aoba Josai players were undoubtedly noted. 

Bokuto plays neutral and was on-guard to ensure another fight won’t break out while Akaashi was talking to the rest of the search party in lieu of a lunch break. Even though the spectacle resulted in numerous cuts and bruises that was more tiresome than the trekking itself, Yahaba was grateful for the intervention.

A knife was needed to cut the heavy and ongoing tension between the former players of Karasuno and Aoba Josai. Hinata’s disappearance marked the loss their mediator, which was ill-mature on both parts as they should’ve left the volleyball rivalry on the court. 

Hinata would _definitely cry_ if he could see them now, wasting time searching for his whereabouts instead of prioritizing more important matters such as work, school life and _volleyball._

Yahaba seethes at the thought of the sport that reminded him so much of the ginger-haired Libero.

If only he wasn’t blinded by the selfish desire to win and consumed by the hungry notion to prove himself in front of a hundred insignificant faces _in the name of fucking volleyball_ then Hinata would still be here.

He’d be here, a hand rubbing slow circular motions at his back to comfort him. Even if Yahaba doesn’t deserve it.

“Are you okay?”

Yahaba sees the second subject of his misery for a brief moment. He sees his jeweled, beryl eyes and a soft parting of his lips quirked in worry. But in a blink, the image of Hinata melted into semi-bleached hair and sharp, cat-like golden eyes. It was Kozume, Nekoma’s former setter. 

Yahaba likes to think he was going crazy. And he deserves that.

“Peachy.” He says between gritted teeth.

Kozume didn’t believe him one bit, and looked like he wanted to ask something else when Sawamura and Nishinoya catches the group’s attention as they ran down the soft greenery. They were red from sweat and grim from something else. This couldn’t be good.

“The letters,” Sawamura starts, ignoring the worried gestures from his friends as they try to sit him down and drink water first. “The letters were forged.”

Yahaba’s blood ran cold.

“They’re re-operating the case. It’s suspected foul play.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yahaba in the middle of the chapter: Two guys sleeping in the same bed, not facing each other cause they're not gay.  
> Also Yahaba: *Cannot breathe without Hinata*
> 
> Yahaba when Hinata joined AobaJosai: *Character development to be a better captain*  
> Also Yahaba when Hinata joined AobaJosai: *manipulates him*
> 
> Everyone at the end of the chapter: WHAT 
> 
> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated :D  
> Next Probable (if not earlier) Update: Sept 3


	3. In the Heat of the Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For someone with neatly trimmed nails and calloused palms of a setter, Kageyama Tobio hits like a motherfucker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY HEY HEY EARLY UPDATE! 
> 
> THIS. WAS. A. MONSTER. TO WRITE QAQ and the last two chapters will be an absolute nightmare.  
> 2014 timeline unlocked!
> 
> Unfortunately I had to do a rewrite so this will be a filler chapter for now. Apologies as the plot does not thicken yet but there are a lot of hints here that will make sense for the chapter 4. For now, enjoy angst-y Yahaba getting the short end of the stick as he realizes what it really takes to be a captain.

**_2013, Seijoh High Gymnasium_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Being the captain of the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball Club had a number of requirements to meet which includes and was not limited to a tall, pretty—faced setter who could throw and take a punch or two. Yahaba Shigeru fits the first criteria very well, even if he didn’t have half the beauty Oikawa possessed or his ~~insane~~ skills and techniques, but he was just as dedicated to improve anyways.

He was prepared in whipping his teammates into their best shape, to coordinate them in the art of tactics and make sure to leave a mark when he passes the crown to the next captain on. 

What he wasn’t prepared for was the many documents that came with the jobs. There was a mountain of paper works, albeit not as big as before since the recruitment took a lint from their consecutive losses. The application and tryouts was slow and only six new faces barely made the cut.

There was Himekawa Jun, second year resident pretty boy with dark hair and brooding velvet eyes. A man of little words for his bored facial expression spoke plenty, and only moving if it’s of convenience for him. When it came to volleyball, he was average at receives, serves and blocks but surprisingly excelled in setting a good enough toss.

Hinata called him the second-coming of one Kageyama Tobio, but Yahaba begged to differ. The bandages on his fingers were too familiar not to recognize a hard-worker from a natural-born genius. 

Sakai Hitoshi shyly trailed after Himekawa despite the obvious difference in their height and their same year standing. A former goalie of the soccer club and while his sudden shift of interest was still up for debate, Sakai was decent with guess and read blocking. He immediately makes the first string. 

Yuda Kaneo’s younger twin brothers take the team tryouts by a storm as they gallantly wreaked havoc across the court. Both were incredibly powerful wing spikers, movements in synced as if they had what most people call the _infamous twin telepathy_ , ever-shifting and exchanging positions as a decoy and a wing spiker respectively. The only defining difference between Tsubasa and Sora was that the latter was incredibly rude.

Yahaba likes to think of them as Hinata’s love children should he have ended up with the lesser evil of the Miya twins from Inarizaki. Hinata hits him with his infamous head serves.

The other freshman who was unlucky to have been grouped with the hellion twins was the shy Mizuki Shin, whose attitude takes a hundred and eighty degrees turn once he steps foot onto the court. From trembling legs and quivering lips to sharp green eyes that narrows when a ball is tossed in his direction. Yahaba had a feeling that he’ll make a good pair with Himekawa’s sets. 

Then surprisingly Minamoto Mitsue appeared, originally a fellow reserve player with Yahaba who was suspended a year ago for reasons they dare not name. And it was still unbelievable since the brunet was very much harmless.

“It’s always the quiet one.” Yahaba’s conscience in the form of Hanamaki whispered. Minamoto was now a third year and with his suspension lifted, he resumes his position as the pinch server. 

Hinata joins the tryouts last, despite the captain’s protest that he already had a place with them considering their joined practice over the summer. But he should’ve known that the ginger-haired player preferred to earn his spot than to have it handed down to him on a silver platter. 

No longer allowed to spike or serve due to his new position, Hinata _thrives and crawled and struggled_ to make sure the ball never hits the ground instead, no matter what he gave out. Be it his left hand, his right, both, and even his left knee. But Yahaba was glad that he was taking precautions to save his face from Kyoutani’s deadly spikes.

He wouldn’t want to explain why Hinata have to get his braces readjusted. Again.

His right knee was still an issue as he was advised to avoid bending and crouching next to the monstrous high jumps he could no longer perform. Thankfully, their Head Coach still had the address for the same place Oikawa had his knee therapy and advised Hinata to attend every Wednesday should he continue with the team. 

Yahaba likes to thinks that the tryouts went smoothly as they made the twelve members team requirement. But Coach Mizoguchi wanted to throw the towel in and Head Coach Irihata just sighed, _for it is what it is_ , even at the cost of their pride of previously having a long line of players signing up for Aoba Josai reduced to _a merely getting by_. 

And when they were done with the introductions, chaos ensued.

It was expected for a cluster of different personalities in one room for Himekawa apparently rubs Kyoutani the wrong way, the twin hellions roughly rounded Hinata up for his undivided attention from Kindaichi and Kunimi’s circle while Mizuki cried and Minamoto stayed in darkest corner of the gymnasium. 

Only Watari and Sakai were on passable terms. But it only lasted for a sweet two seconds until Sakai ~~brutally~~ bluntly mentioned that Watari’s neck must hurt all day speaking to his juniors.

The captain then wishes he took up Hinata’s offer on the two aspirins and a cold glass of water on his nightstand. 

* * *

**_2013,_ ** **Fukurodani Academy _Gymnasium_**

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Yahaba thanks the heavens and his guiltless manipulative skills for the existence of one Hinata sunshine-incarnate Shouyou within Aoba Josai. If not for him then Yahaba would’ve been converted into a homicidal killer within a week or two.

The mountain of paper works grows in every before-and-after practice as log books and daily data are essential to keeping track of the team’s record. Normally it was the club manager’s task but they hadn’t got a new one since Oikawa’s captaincy ended. Watari offered to help him every now as the new vice-captain, but there was only so much he could do in between Hinata’s special training and the hectic academic life of a third year student.

It was an absolute nightmare. And some paper work weren’t worth writing because in court, everyone was an incredibly team with individual assets that unfortunately haven’t found its clog in the machine. They were still working on it, determined that they had to. But off court was way worse with the infighting, snide comments and underhanded insults.

And that’s where Hinata steps in, ever the mediator buttering everyone’s bread up to dissipate their anger. The reserve libero had the innate ability to get everyone on the same page with one smile and a hell of an empathetic capacity. 

In fact, it was also Hinata who came up with the training regimen to have the players experience what it’s like to be a ball boy once in a while. Not out of spite or a punishment, but a requirement to hone their instincts when it came to understanding the curb of the ball more than the player who struck it. 

Having the reserve libero around helped plenty for Yahaba’s ~~sanity~~ case, but it was as equally relaxing to exhausting when Hinata goes off for his knee therapy. And boy, the practice hours without him feels like eternity as it drags on for whenever a fight breaks out.

Sometimes he wonders how Oikawa managed it all. How any of the previous captains did. Six strong players were indeed stronger together but it seems no one in his team was interested in such. 

This leads to them to their current predicament in a practice match against a parliament of owls. Coach Mizoguchi was getting impatient with the little progress they’ve made when pit against each other, so in order to learn how to respect their teammate they must act like a team first. And what better way than to play against a common enemy?

Thus, one approved request letter and a bus trip to Fukurodani Academy later, the Aoba Josai volleyball club stands on the entrance of the white colored gymnasium.

Yahaba was first to greet Akaashi Keiji and to thank them for their time. The captain gave him a rueful smile in return as they shook hands but his eyes were obviously on the ginger-haired player behind him.

Of course they were curious, especially with the ongoing rumors within the v-league and to everyone who had the pleasure of meeting one Hinata Shouyou. It was the third case on point that Yahaba had to face as a captain, one he reluctantly avoids to do so because Hinata’s sudden transfer was not his story to tell.

~~Even though he played a big hand in it.~~

There were envying eyes and questionable looks upon their arrival. Hushed whispered and questions which ignited the team’s sense of protectiveness for their own. In a blink of eye, they surrounded him ~~and thank god for his short stature~~ until he was out of sight.

‘Isn’t that Karasuno’s #10?’

‘How could he do this to Bokuto-san?’

‘What’s he doing with them?

‘You didn’t know?’

‘-fever during nationals.’

‘Karsuno lost.’

‘His fault.’

His fault.

His fault.

HIS FAULT.

“Ignore them.” Himekawa sternly whispered at the hellion twins ready to pounce at the players they’ve passed by on the way to the guest lockers. “Real volleyball players would rather spend their free time practicing than talking shit behind other’s back.” Kyoutani for once agreed, right after he snarled at them to _fucking_ _beat it_ while Watari scolds him for the use of crude language.

“Okay but that’s only you.” Tsubasa quipped and Sora finished. “Which is why you’re so unpopular.”

A playful set of banter ensues accompanied by hair pulling that on another day Yahaba would’ve told everyone to _~~please shut the fuck up, my head feels like its going to crack open~~ _keep it down but he knew Hinata needed all the distraction and support he could get.

For he had permanently traded the pair of black-colored wings for a turquoise cape and jeweled crown.

It was an incredibly difficult shift from a middle blocker decoy, a master of aerial play and allure to a shadow at the back. An underdog. A second chance. A libero.

Under the careful teachings of Watari Shinji, Hinata makes good of his new profound skills honed with his natural athletic instincts. A hundred receives a day. His battles were now his to fight alone without a setter to toss to him but setter to maneuver the ball to and his field is now the entire court kept inside white lines.

Yahaba admires him, for his dedication and for facing his fear as he debuts as Aoba Josai’s libero. It was bound to happen anyways, but that doesn’t make it any easier.

In the changing room, Hinata was all smiles and okay to avoid riling everyone up into an unnecessary fight but his captain knew better. Knew that he was incredibly bothered by letting Bokuto down, ~~as if he would ever feel that way towards Hinata.~~ They were insecurities he hasn’t told anyone in the club, buried at back of his mind but had Infuriatingly opened up said insecurities to Oikawa.

Well, Fake-Oikawa whom Yahaba conjured when he gave his new number exclusively for Hinata to contact. From the good mornings and good nights, eat properly and do your bests messages that sounded exactly how Oikawa would phrase it to alien humor underlying heart-warming messages and comfort.

And Yahaba would know it worked from the way Hinata’s eyes twinkle at the sound of his phone’s message notification, or flush he couldn’t kill after reading its contents. They were obviously pinning on each other anyways so it wouldn’t hurt to use his friend’s crush in lieu of improving his performance.

And Yahaba ~~strangely~~ feels no guilt about it.

* * *

Aoba Josai takes the first set by 25-20 at the expense of their energy reserve running low. Yahaba’s long range tosses and Kyoutani’s spikes could only earn so many points before they hand the next match to the younger and newer players. For all that’s worth, Kunimi, Kindaichi and Sakai’s three man block proved to be a deadly weapon that can par against Akaashi’s calculating sets.

The whistle blew, signaling the next round that exclusively consisted of Aoba Josai’s reserve players, to which their opponents arched an eyebrow at their somewhat discriminatory approach. What they didn’t understand was that it was a plan to use the starting players on the first match to set their winning standards and throw the opposite side of the court’s momentum.

One of the few advantages of having a line of fresh faces in the team is that no data could be recorded and used against them. Yet.

Fukurodani takes the first ball using an underhand serve that created a high and slow motioned phase. Immediately, all the blue players were on guard with their eyes squinting from the light but never leaving the ball. Fortunately Hinata had already encountered this type of serve during his last nationals and was slightly immune from its effect. He breathes, changes his position and receives it.

Himekawa snaps out of his stupor when the ball was passed to him before tossing to Tsubasa with Sora behind him to take his place.

They spike at the same time.

Akaashi bristles at the new decoy duo while the rest of his teammates started murmuring about Hinata’s unexpected position. Their suspicions confirmed when Hinata was skipped a service turn. It was official, he is a libero now.

The game drags on, surprisingly comprised with smooth and coordinated rallies. A few points exchanged every now and then before Aoba Josai takes the second set. But despite the consecutive wins, Yahaba felt uneasy. So did Watari and Hinata. There was dread hanging in the air, as if Fukurodani didn’t show them everything yet.

And they really didn’t.

They get deadly serious on the third, fourth and fifth sets. As it turned out, Akaashi had been building a weapon of their own, one worthy of making it to Nationals even without Bokuto in their corner anymore- an umbrella. Or perhaps, THE Umbrella. It wasn’t an impregnable wall ~~yet~~ but it was enough to make anyone hitting the ball second guess their strategy.

It takes a mere second to change form, to change a straight shot to a cross or a feint, and Akaashi takes advantage of that slight falter. Because the moment the ball attempts to hit their side of the court, someone was already there to return it to them.

* * *

The loss stung, but it was expected for the price of achieving what they came for.

The mix and match of reserve and starting players within Aoba Josai was getting better as they had progressed steps further in cementing their teamwork to create the perfect court.

They learn each other’s quirks, deal with it, make good of it, and use it to their advantage in improving their skill set. There was no doubt that Himekawa's sets could also make a great combination with Tsubasa and Sora’s decoy strategy while Yahaba with Mizuki and Kyoutani’s demanding but unrelenting spikes. Then there was Watari’s fast receives working with Kunimi’s slow tosses and Kindachi's fast phased spikes.

The most unexpected match however, was Hinata and Minamoto’s private practices. The two, if the libero was not feeling boisterous, would seclude themselves on another part of the gymnasium discussing ~~god knows what~~ helpful strategies that steels their performance. To Minamoto who was out of practice and to Hinata who has yet to full ground himself to his new position.

Nevertheless it was a very productive day.

What Yahaba wasn’t expecting was Akaashi pulling Hinata into a secluded corner below their designated locker room. Now he wasn’t one to eavesdrop or meddle, but anything that concerned Hinata was enough to garner his attention and twist his personality from underdog to overprotective friend.

“-okay?”

Hinata softly chuckles. “I’m fine Akaashi-san. My knee isn’t good as before but that doesn’t mean I can’t play anymore.”

But the Fukurodani captain was nowhere near convinced. “Are you having fun?”

Yahaba resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Just what did they take Aoba Josai for?

“Honestly, no.”

Wait what?

  
“It’s not fun when you’re not spiking the ball, when you’re not jumping, when you’re stuck and you can't see the summit from the other side- “he exhales a deep sigh, the angriest Yahaba’s ever heard. “but I’ll clench my teeth and fight another way. Because it’s not fun to lose either.”

* * *

****

**_2013, Miyagi Prefectural Qualifiers_ **

**_Northern Japan_ **

Yahaba breathes and takes everything in- the pressure, the white noise, the familiar smell of salonpas, the haunting memories and tears of loss. Everything.

Aoba Josai is back, and they will rule the court.

All eyes were on the ruined castle, drinking at the sight of the team's new faces while preying on any open weaknesses they could find. Unfortunately, they were in it for a ride.

They crushed Kakugawa High under the sole of their boot within three sets with incredible point gaps, most earned by Tsubasa and Sora when they debuted as Aoba Josai’s duo decoys followed by Wakutani South for without Nakashima Takeru, their previous ace, they crumbled.

It couldn’t be helped, this was another volleyball season and everyone will have to get used to a new team. Yet-

YET-

Yahaba’s foot struck the metal locker so hard it caused a dent. They had two consecutive matches, both won with ease, yet they were hollow victories for those teams could barely put out a fight to draw Aoba Josai’s potential out.

It was so _fucking easy_ that they hadn’t even put Hinata out for more than one set in a game or Mizuki at all! The captain seethes, his tantrum radiating of agitation and annoyance towards his teammates. His coaches just turned the other cheek in understanding as the rest of the team fell silent. Unfortunately, Kunimi didn’t. 

“You shouldn’t insult our opponents like that.” He says, only to be meet with tortilla colored eyes brimming with fury.

“Of course you’d prefer plays like these. Easy wins, easy outs.” Yahaba didn’t realize he had already left the dented locker as he took three long strides up to Kunimi’s space. Kindaichi and Kyoutani were ready to pounce at him should he take another step closer. “Lazy.”

At this point it didn’t matter who had their hands on his jersey first, but he definitely saw a flash of turquoise that pushed him out of the locker room. There were screams, accusations and colorful choices of words thrown in the air but were easily drowned by the storm brewing inside the captain’s mind.

“Huh.” Yahaba straightens the wrinkles of his white jersey to hide the coloring bruise on his arm as he tries to think of how Hinata could put up with bigger injuries than this.

On cue, the reserve libero steps out of the room, immediately closing the door behind him before starring him down with angry, jeweled beryl eyes. And when he blinked, Yahaba exhaled the breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

Wordlessly they made their way outside the stadium and into the familiar space of vast greenery. The breeze felt light, considering it was still midday and an hour before their next match with Karasuno or Shiratorizawa, and the plants were lusher. It was hard to believe that a year had passed when they started meeting here.

They stayed like that for long, uncomfortable moment with Hinata’s back facing him and Yahaba’s anger dissipating by the silence. It felt wrong.

“… I’m sorry.” He finally says and suddenly the reserve libero had thrown his arms around him.

“Good. You should be.” Hinata nuzzles into the collar of his jersey as Yahaba basks in his warm comfort.

* * *

They face Karasuno in the Quarterfinals.

Sawamura, Sugawara and Asahi’s faces were no longer to be found within their line of players, now replaced with younger ones ~~who were excitedly eyeing Hinata from the other side~~ , but nevertheless the murder of crows carried the weight of suffocating intensity that radiated across the court. 

Everyone, especially those familiar with Karasuno’s ex-middle blocker, held their breath as Kageyama approaches his old partner from under the net. Hinata, with no sense of danger or whatsoever, followed. Cobalt eyes meet jeweled, beryl ones with a hint of burning rivalry and underlying fondness.

~~Yahaba didn’t like that at all.~~

“I won’t lose to you.”

The words escape their mouth at ~~annoyingly~~ the same time and that set the Aoba Josai captain off. It was apparent that whatever feud they had were long settled, that Kageyama didn’t care about his supposed best friend’s ~~betrayal~~ sudden transfer or his change in playing position. Hinata’s uniform clearly screamed libero and that should’ve thrown Karasuno’s tyrant setter in confusion to what was left of the weapon he once built. 

Yet nothing of sort happened. Just acceptance. Just volleyball.

“Oi Yahaba-san-“ he pointedly ignored and yanked his arm off Sakai’s firm hold. He hasn’t apologized to Kunimi or his teammates yet but he was already hellbent on starting another fight. For it couldn’t be helped as the heat of the moment was a whirlwind of angry emotions dissipating any trace of Hinata’s warmth.

“Are you happy now?” he sneers, catching Kageyama off-guard. And boy, did he relish at the other setter's growing confusing. “To see the fruits of your cynical efforts bloom?”

“Ha?”

“You act like you don’t know but I know better. Hell, I treat him better. Because you never cared to.” He laughs. “He can’t fly anymore. Because of _you._ ”

Getting into Kageyama’s head ignited a sick sense of pleasure for the captain as it seems to have affected his game play. Karasuno could still fly and hit his tosses regardless of their wing span but-

“One touch!” Sakai yelled, the rally continued by Hinata’s effortless receive maneuvered to Yahaba who tosses to Kyoutani and _spiked._ The whistle blew and it indicated that they’ve return the ball easily. 

Two rotations later and Yahaba was once again faced off with Kageyama and only a net separating them. “What the hell were you talking about?” he hissed to which Yahaba just arched an eyebrow to.

Was he really clueless or did the captain have to mention that Hinata _almost died_ because of him too? “Stop playing ignorant. It doesn’t suit you, mister genius setter.” He was getting under Kageyama’s skin deeper than Oikawa’s jests ever had.

Yamaguchi from Karasuno executes a precise jump floater, perfectly caught in the net just in time for Hinata to dive and recieve it. Kindaichi follows but it gave their opponent a chance ball.

“Focus.” The wing spiker hissed at his captain, obviously have not let bygones be bygones from the earlier incident just yet. Yahaba eats his pride and nods.

Karasuno does a synchronized attack the moment Kageyama takes his position to signal a toss. Hinata’s eyes widened at the familiar sequence, lower lips parted as he gets into his stance. It was a minus tempo and there was no telling who was going to hit-

Tsukishima does, with unrelenting force that even when Aoba Josai’s libero caught it, Hinata crumbled. The ball ricocheted and Karasuno scores a point. Now that would’ve normally earned a smirk from the genius setter but whatever his suspicions earlier were confirmed when he saw the libero clutching his left knee.

And then it clicked to both setters. Yahaba realized that it wasn’t Kageyama who chased Hinata out that night, neither did he know. But it was too late for the damaged was done as the raven head thoughtlessly made his way across the court despite the umpire’s warning whistles or the crowd’s surprised reactions.

Hinata was held up by Kyoutani whose concerned expression immediately melted into a defensive one, shielding the ginger-haired player from Kageyama’s sight. But unfazed, he callously grabbed Hinata and pulled the bulkier leg warmer down to reveal a white cast. 

It was a knee support.

Much like the earlier locker room incident, all hell broke loose- accusations thrown in the air, Hinata’s eyes brimming with tears while his best friend yelled desperately at him ~~tell me it’s not true! Tell me-!~~

Immediately both captains were pulling them apart with Ennoshita miserably failing to calm their genius setter down while Yahaba hugged their sobbing libero out of sight. His heartbeats were erratic and he was wheezing so badly that Yahaba could only compare the situation akin to a panic attack.

The blind rage coils up once more as he faces the other setter burning with fury as he mouths “Look at what you’ve done.” He gets the last words stuck to his throat when he was struck down in a blur of black and cobalt eyes as his consciousness is thrown in disarray around the vast gymnasium.

For someone with neatly trimmed nails and calloused palms of a setter, Kageyama Tobio hits like a motherfucker.

* * *

Seijoh High’s Aoba Josai Men’s Volleyball Team is disqualified for the rest of the Miyagi Qualifiers. As per observation that it was their captain who instigated the fight by provoking Karasuno’s setter. And despite being the one who threw the first punch, it was them who were sent home while the opposing team advances with a slap on the wrist.

Yahaba Shigeru, said captain who was responsible for the whole thing, opted to take the bus home alone as nobody in his team could afford to look at him right now. Bruised arms and a cut his on lower lips didn't garner enough pity to put up with his behavior for the day. No one protested at his abrupt decision, not even his coaches, not even Hinata.

Hinata Shouyou who looks up to him with doe eyes full of wonder and smiled at his presence like he could do no wrong. But today, his warm smile melted into a pair of dead eyes that coldly looked at him in a familiar expression.

Disappointment.

Utter disappointment to have trusted him with a secret that was never his to tell, let alone accused the wrong person while he was at it.

He felt shame. And it was laughable for he never had the need to drown himself in guilt, not even when he manipulated Hinata into thinking that Aoba Josai was the only club for him when he decided to step down as a middle blocker to a libero. That Kageyama, much like their first fight, would never understand how him. And Karasuno? They would never treat him the same.

If Hinata was not so vulnerable at that moment then he would’ve defended his teammates, that they weren’t as shallow as Yahaba. And that was the truth.

Hell, he still couldn’t bring himself to feel sorry for tricking Hinata into thinking he was texting Oikawa all along. No one knew where the previous members of their club went after high school as they have yet to make their whereabouts known.

And maybe that was why it was easy to pretend to be Hinata’s crush under the guise of improving his performance, as there are things love can make you do that friendship can’t. Oikawa, wherever he may be, will never have to know as they’ll eventually drift apart. Hinata would move on and this will be treated as a fleeting school boy crush.

Their previous captain was good with cutting people out after he’s done playing his chapter in their life after all. 

The long and quiet bus ride home made him reflect on today’s actions as well as make peace with his insecurities and guiltless self. He knows he will never regret making Hinata an Aoba Josai libero be it for friendship or winning reasons.

And they still had the Spring Tournament to hold on to and for Yahaba to make it up to his teammates. To make it up to Hinata sunshine-incarnate Shouyou. 

* * *

**_2014, Seijoh High_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Smiles and warm hugs were a Hinata thing as much as being able to lie easily through their teeth was a Yahaba thing. The only common ground the two could ever meet was sunsets and tears and basking in each other’s comfort. For it was a private moment reserved only for them to lay their hearts open and bare and vulnerable without scrutiny at the expense of their weakness.

It was the only time they could feel _human._

This sunset however, was different. There was no greenery, no warm breeze or tears to be shed. Just the coldness that resides within the Aoba Josai captain’s heart as he stares at broken body down the flight.

He couldn’t move. His breathing stilled. Hinata’s words of comfort were lost, resounding in empty hallways as sentences Yahaba couldn’t make sense of.

_~~Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead.~~ _

For ten steps beneath him were their libero’s soft orange locks drenched in his pool of blood. 

* * *

**_2016, Kyushu University_ **

**_Sports Science Department_ **

Two weeks has passed since the investigation for the disappearance of Hinata Shouyou has been re-operated to a potential murder case. Twenty days and ten hours nearing a month since the incident and Yahaba could feel the phone on his left pocket getting heavier and heavier as it drags on. Eventually, they were forced back into _getting on with their lives_ and entrusting the police to take care of the case.

Kageyama was the most reluctant, obviously onto something, or someone rather. And Yahaba didn’t like that at all. 

The only silver lining of the situation was that at least he didn’t have to write the letters anymore. It was as equally exhausting pretending to be the ginger-haired player as it was to be Oikawa years ago. The latter only had one person to fool while Hinata had hundreds of friends to send a letter to.

He’d have to burn the leftover stationery when he gets back to his dorm room.

With that in mind, he makes a detour from his classroom to their department head’s office as prior requested of his presence upon returning to the campus. Sleep deprived, he made himself known without knocking as his hands were full with a cup of black coffee on one hand ~~for bribe~~ and a stack of papers on the other.

He expected pity and leniency from the on-going chaos at his hometown but was met with a group of police cramped inside the room instead.

“What-?”

“Yahaba Shigeru.” It was Detective Sawamura, the one exclusively entrusted with Hinata’s case. “We’ve found a couple of Hinata’s belongings scattered around Miyagi’s cliff side.”

His blood ran cold and his vision started to spin.

They know.

They know.

They know.

THEY KNOW.

A hand on his shoulder managed to snap him out of his stupor as they sat him down the extra chair. He was shaking, coffee spilt and the stack of paper scattered on the floor but forgotten as everyone in the room looked at him in pity. ~~~~

Yahaba tries to even out his breath, tries to remember Hinata’s words but his mind was blank and devoid of voices. Instead he saw colors- soft and muted orange, yellow, red, ~~blood red red red red red-~~

“I know this is a lot to take in right now, but in order to find your friend or at least confirm his situation, we will need you to cooperate with us” says Detective Sawamura as he kneels down to meet his eyes. “For you see, we’ve found our first suspect.”

He wills himself to nod in confirmation before a zip locked picture is thrust into his clammy palms. Tortilla colored eyes was misty but he could definitely make out the smiling face of Oikawa Tooru. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were a lot of deleted scenes here but I had to make do with putting out the hints than the Yahaba/Hinata bromance as well as some (pretend) OiHina snippets. T^T I'll make it up on the next chapter. 
> 
> And New Side Characters Unlocked! Next chapter will consist of team bonding, OiHina (the real deal) and the plot thickens (for real this time ahahhaha) ! 
> 
> RESERVE TEAM  
> Himekawa Jun (Setter)  
> Yuda Tsubasa (Left-side Hitters or Outside Hitters)  
> Yuda Sora (Right-side Hitters or Opposite Hitters)  
> Minamoto Mitsue (Pinch Server)  
> Hinata Shouyou (Libero)  
> Mizuki Shin (Wing spiker/Middle blocker) 
> 
> STARTING TEAM  
> Yahaba Shigeru (Setter)  
> Watari Shinji (Libero)  
> Kyoutani Kentaro (Wing spiker/ Ace)  
> Kindaichi Yutaro (Left-side Hitters or Outside Hitters)  
> Kunimi Akira (Right-side Hitters or Opposite Hitters)  
> Sakai Hitoshi (Middle blocker/ Defensive Specialist)
> 
> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated :D  
> Next Probable (if not earlier) Update: Sept 7


	4. Sometimes the person you’d take a bullet for is behind the trigger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Is it ghoulish of me to think that this place would be the perfect spot to hide a body?” Yahaba mussed, to which he earned a light punch on the right shoulder from his friend. 
> 
> “Incredibly so.” Hinata deadpans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please accept this one day early update as an offering for the changes I've made. Unfortunately, the story will prolong to six chapters instead of five. This is due to the current events in the original chapter 4 draft that exceeded the word count I usually have (4.5k ish at max.) 
> 
> With that said, I'll have to cut the other timelines and scenes out to use it on the next chapter.  
> For now, enjoy and happy reading! 
> 
> WARNINGS: Mentions of drug use and abuse

**_2013, Seijoh High Gymnasium_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

“I’m sorry!” His head was down at the lowest bow he could ever do, stance firm and un-moving. “I wasn’t thinking about our team’s best interest. Well, _I was_ but that was absolutely the wrong way to go. I was deplorable and obsessed with winning that I hurt all of you. Kunimi and Hinata most especially.”

His eyes were shut tight, afraid to look up and see the rest of his teammates who were probably looking down at him in disgust. But Yahaba doesn’t hold it against them. He was their captain and he sunk their ship on the first, big game of the year. He’d hate himself too.

“All I wanted was to take revenge, to make good our promise to go to nationals for our senpais who couldn’t-

“See, that’s your problem!” yelled Kindaichi, no doubt a snarl on his face. “You are so _caught up_ in the past that you deliberately forget the present.”

“That sounds like a line from a cheesy movie, Turnip Head-senpai.” Sora snickered, only to be swatted at the back of the head by Himekawa. Kindaichi blushes a shade of red, both from anger and embarrassment until he felt Hinata’s hand on his, encouraging him to continue. “They’ll always have a place in our team but _this_ is the current Aoba Josai. _We_ are your current teammates now.”

Kunimi speaks up next. “So if we’re going to win, it’ll be for us. Not for them.” There is a collective murmur of agreement yet Yahaba still wasn’t compelled to look up. The shame was grounding him from doing so. But he does peek at the sound of footprints towards him, vision making out a small pair of white shoes before he felt warm palms on both sides of his cheeks.

He missed this. He missed him. 

“I’m sorry.”

“You should be.” Was Hinata’s cheeky response. “But you do owe me one.”

“Anything.”

It was when Hinata’s warm smile melted into a shit-eating grin that Yahaba regretted being so ambiguous with his offer to make it up to them.

* * *

**_2013, Forestry Reserve_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

“Why me?” Yahaba complained for the nth time but his mulling was drowned out by their rowdy group as the last bus drops them off in the middle of nowhere.

The hellion twins were already running down the hill with poor Mizuki on tow, followed by Himekawa who deliberately sprains his ankle upon the first step to the wet, grassy patch while Sakai rolls down with their baggage. There was Minamoto in the corner of the road puking his guts out and Kindachi was trying to keep Kunimi awake and standing, all the while Kyoutani looked ready to hitch hike on the next ride that comes. 

This was the chaotic team of the Aoba Josai Volleyball Club, sounds about right.

Watari laughs at the absurdity of the situation while Yahaba continued to ponder on how he was easily coerced into this situation. Then Hinata shows up looking radiant and refreshing as ever as if the three hours bus trip that they took around four in the morning didn't exhaust him at all. He rest his palms against the road’s metal railings as he eyes the generous view daybreak has to offer.

The braces of his pearly white teeth gleamed with his smile.

They should be practicing; training restlessly for the Spring Qualifiers yet here they were on a two nights and three days trip to camp in the middle of nowhere. For worse, their coaches easily approved of the sudden request for the team bonding given that Hinata, the perpetrator of the whole idea, would take full responsibility for the entire trip. And Yahaba took no offense to that. ~~Even if it was his part-time job’s savings that were spent on bus tickets and meat.~~

The team without a doubt trusted their reserve libero and packed their bags without further questions. But that didn’t mean they have to enjoy the entire trip, as none of them were used to travelling long distance in rocky, mountain roads.

They trek for a good two hours, only stopping to take pictures of the sun shining against the cluster of tall trees or for water breaks. Their pants were misty against the cold air but their bodies sweat in satisfaction than of exhaustion. It felt like the good kind of burn that only their reserve libero could ignite. 

It was exhilarating.

“It’s like you know the mountains like the back of your hand, senpai.” Mizuki says as he practically drags his feet against the patch of slightly wet grass while Hinata shrugged without a single trace of sweat or exhaustion. “I use to live near the mountains. Had to take an hour bike ride to school every day.”

His captain narrowed his eyes at the mention of the bike, memories of his near death resurfacing once more. While Yahaba knew that Hinata hasn’t rode the thing since the incident, made him promise not to, he was still tempted to have it destroyed at the junkyard to cement his certainty. Hinata calls him out on his over-protectiveness and stated that he rides the bus now given that his new address and route doesn’t really provide a bike trail.

~~Another reason why he can never find himself guilty of manipulating his friend into transferring to Seijoh.~~

After passing a log bridge, the group wandered deeper into a secluded area within the forestry that they didn’t even think existed in Miyagi. It was enchanting- evergreen lush, had bushes of berries and scented flowers and the only sounds that resounded throughout the frame of trees were nature herself.

“Is it _ghoulish_ of me to think that this place would be the perfect spot to hide a body?” Yahaba mussed, to which he earned a light punch on the right shoulder from his friend.

“Incredibly so.” Hinata deadpans.

They divide the day’s work into teams with the passable skillsets- the seniors in charge of setting the tents up, second years with the cooking and the first years with Hinata to collect water. However, it didn’t even take three full buckets to hear groans and frustrated screaming from the other side of the shallow streams.

Yahaba and Kyoutani were pulling at the tent cloth _so hard_ that it ripped while Minamoto lay helplessly tangled in his. Kindaichi and Himekawa weren’t doing so good either with their backwater way of thinking that rubbing two wet twigs together would start the fire instead of using the ~~obvious~~ portable grill while Kunimi _astoundingly slept upright_ with a knife in one hand and a cucumber he apparently wanted to peel on the other. And Sakai? Very distracted as he pokes at a suspiciously moving rock.

Not that it was also great from Hinata’s end as Sora and Tsubasa opted to ditch their chore buckets to pour a generous amount of it over Mizuki’s head.

It was hopeless. But at least Watari was taking pictures with his phone to commemorate the ~~chaos~~ moment.

Another round of reassignments later, with Hinata barking orders ~~to get their ass out of their head, it’s not a hat,~~ and taking charge of lunch with Kyoutani, who was surprisingly an incredible cook, before the food was finally served. It came in platters of juicy, barbecued grub and fresh cut vegetables that wasn’t the cucumber Kunimi was currently brandishing like a weapon against the thieving hellion twins. Their reserve libero has single-handedly introduced them to the god of meat.

The afternoon was spent running around playing childish games that were clearly pass their age like tag, beetle collecting and tree climbing as they weren't really in the mood to do anything planned like three legged races or a test of courage. It was apparent that they just needed to unwind after the humiliating disqualification back at Miyagi Qualifiers. But even though volleyball became an unspoken rule as something banned from the entire trip, Minamoto who accidentally bought one out of habit had everyone immediately forming a large group circle doing a regular don’t-drop-the-ball practice. And when the air gets chilly and the sweat dried on their shirts, they set for camp.

Because of the tattered tents that weren’t spared from Yahaba’s and Kyoutani’s ~~stupidity~~ feud, they opted to make do with their sleeping bags around the camp fire.

“But it’s dangerous!” Kindaichi exclaimed. “There could be bears here.”

“As if it’ll approach a large and annoying crowd as this.” Himekawa rolled his eyes with faux confident while Hinata pondered if he should correct him for his own safety, seeing as he had his fair share of encountering wild animals be it in the forest or the bathroom. Sakai agrees but immediately yelped at the sound of a broken twig, the culprits behind him with their tongues out. “Little shits-!”

“Language.” Wateri quips but was ignored in favor of Sora and Tsubasa running amok the leftovers of the tents. “We can fix this!” they say in unison before they started hoarding the twigs and skillfully maneuvering around the cloth. As it turned out, the two were boy scouts with an ambitious number of badges, one of which includes accurate knife throwing.

“Fucking demons.” Yahaba stands by his conviction that the twins were probably Hinata’s and Miya Atsumu’s demon spawns and doesn’t bother dodging the ball served at the back of his head again. 

The rest then decided to make themselves useful by cleaning their mess before the night blankets them with cold and star lights.

* * *

“-and then they looked down on their feet, only to see their Miruku’s eyes staring at them from the icy depths of the waters below.”

Mizuki was Mizuki- tall, an apologetic mushroom making him an easy target for the twins and has two personalities buried beneath his pale skin that apparently doesn’t just switch in and off court but when the sun goes down too. He turns cynical, telling a dead man’s tale as if it was nothing as everyone huddled up in cramp log ten safety feet away from him.

“Help.” He croaks, mimicking the woman's voice in his story, and everyone screams.

It was around nine in the evening already, the appropriate time for sleep should they have been home after practice, but too early when it came to camping. Or at least that’s what Hinata told them before passing out like a hypocrite. So to further enjoy the night without their reserve libero’s nagging, they pass the time exchanging completely random stories ranging from volleyball, to ghost tales that would keep definitely keep them awake before proceeding to their _non-existent_ love lives.

Kindaichi retells the story of Yahaba’s unfortunate encounter that involved making a handsome ‘Squidward’ face at Karasuno’s younger manager, to which their captain refutes to pettily calling him a turnip head. The banter followed with the twin’s sudden attack on Himekawa’s questionable taste when it came to the dating life as they caught him going for route B- a twin tailed _tsundere_ who kept making him burnt lunch. Watari arches as eyebrow to which Sakai fills him in that their peculiar setter plays a Bishojou game on his console.

“If you have time to sleuth around people’s love interest, then how come you haven’t figured out who Hinata-san’s dating yet?” he says bluntly. Then the banter stops and all their thoughts were on their reserve libero and mystery guy with a punch-able but censored face. “He’s on his phone 24/7, it’s not that hard not to decipher that.”

Sora asks what decipher meant to which Tsubasa answer that it’s someone who follows in their master’s teachings. 

“Now that you've mention it,” Watari thinks “he ran into a pole last yesterday and apologized without looking up. All because he was too busy texting god-knows-who.” There was a collective murmur of agreement, now freely exchanging stories of how Hinata was caught not more than once, extremely distracted and oblivious of his surroundings.

~~Yahaba ignores the second phone hidden in the depths of his duffel.~~

“I propose a game.” He says instead, refusing to look at his friend fast asleep on the tent just a few meters away from them. “Since I clearly know who this mystery person is, _best friend rights_ and all, I will reward the winner to decide who will be the ball boy for the entire month.”

Sora and Tsubasa inwardly cringed when they felt all eyes fall upon them, burning with revenge. 

“I’ll start,” Sakai unexpectedly goes first with the sadistic gleam in his eyes, obviously thinking of how satisfying it’ll be to destroy the hellion twins with his spikes. “Is she pretty?”

“Pretty, yes. She, no.” the reserve setter is awarded with half a point. The game starts and continued with Mizuki who earns a solid two on the accurate age gap category while Watari earns one upon mentioning the obvious height difference.

“Volleyball player! Hinata-senpai definitely won’t date anyone who isn’t as obsessed with it as he is.” Tsubasa high-fives his twin in scoring the two points that’ll probably save their asses from the wrath of their heinous prank victims. Seeing the familiar way the two interact made Yahaba realize that maybe one of the reasons why Kyoutani and Watari were so used to their antics was because they fondly reminded them of Matsukawa and Hanamaki. “And this mystery hunk is definitely a genius.”

Yahaba gives an ex mark on the last guess, narrowing the game by any other adjectives they could come up with. Skilled. Popular. A total dumbass. Brown hair. Tall. Kyoutani earns a straight ten points upon guessing he’s a setter and then Mizuki takes the lead once more when he guessed that the mystery guy played in Aoba Josai.

Everyone held their breath at the last revelation as they connected the fragments of information together. Gone were the enthusiastic musings, now replaced with uncertainty that made Yahaba sweat drop in dread. Was it so impossible to believe that Hinata likes Oikawa Tooru? Sure Hinata was the sunshine-incarnate who could do no wrong and Oikawa was sometimes the literal embodiment of a human trash can but there were also times their reserve libero was just as bad as the previous captain was. 

“I can’t believe it’s been happening under our noses the whole time.” Watari was half betrayed and half exasperated.

“I should’ve known Hinata would have shitty tastes in men. The king was one thing, but him?” Kindaichi shakes his head in disappointment and Kunimi cries. “Who would’ve thought?”

Yahaba was undoubtedly getting confused. The freshmen and newcomers aside, did the rest seriously not notice the suffocating sexual tension in the court whenever they’ve faced off with Karasuno in the past? Was Oikawa not that obvious with his blatant comparison of _chibi-chan’s spikes_ or Hinata’s kissing the ground to which the _Grand King_ walks whenever mentioned?

“This is a low-blow, even from you Yahaba-san.” Says Himekawa which catches him off-guard. “If you wanted to announce your relationship to stroke your ego, you didn’t have to put out a reward for it.”

“Wait what?”

Red was not a good color on him, especially on his cheeks as everyone decided to turn the tables on him, completely disregarding his position as their senpai and captain. They relentlessly _teased_ him, poked at his weakness and ignored his denials. That yes, he was definitely dating Hinata and it was lame that they had to hide their relationship via text messages despite the obvious. Never minding the countless sleepovers, hugs and secret meetings in the stadium gardens that weren't really a secret anymore-

“Can’t a man sleep in another bed with his best friend without making it gay?!” he screams while everyone just shook their heads in disbelief. That was a no. But they were _so loud_ that they didn’t hear the footsteps coming from behind them, exhibiting the deadliest aura that could rival Sawamura and Iwaizumi combined. 

“SHUT. UP.” Hinata commands and everyone screamed.

Needless to say they all slept outside the tent that cold night to rethink their actions, save for Minamoto who didn’t participate in the distasteful game. Apparently, hell hath no fury like Hinata waking up in the middle of the night scorned. 

“You’re an idiot.” Says Mizuki, even with his personality switch down. Yahaba doesn’t say anything but silently agreed. 

* * *

The next morning was spent in a new and better routine where their designated chores doesn’t involve infighting or Himekawa’s _astounding_ ability to somehow burn water.

They move their camp near the streams for a change of scenery. And when Hinata deemed the river shallow and safe enough for a short swim, the group excitedly dived half naked into the icy waters before scrambling back up in a ten seconds record. It took a few more dips before their bodies became used to the temperature and back to swimming again. What originally was supposed to be a morning bath ~~to absolve them of their sins~~ to replenish their strength, according to whatever spiritual pamphlet Hinata picked up on the elder Yahaba's clinic, turned into an hour long splash war that involved horsing around and acrobatics. 

It took Minamoto’s strength and Hinata’s sinister smile to get them out before they risk catching a cold.

Come midday and they smoke the river fishes they’ve caught, or rather what the shirtless Kyoutani and the hellion twins had put on a makeshift snare did, and ate a hearty lunch. It wasn’t that much different from the previous day but nevertheless convivial. Yahaba couldn’t remember the last time they had fun like this, one that didn’t involve winning.

For the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club was known for its three strings of players, its ruthless training regimen, its formidable castle, its-

Its ability to make the best high school memories ever. This wasn’t the first time they’ve done a team bonding trip, given that those occasions were usually reserved for training camp and school festivals, but it was so far the best one they’ve experience. When Oikawa was captain, they had dedicated the majority of their time to practice hard and harder. He, much like his predecessors, held the honorable position of a strict yet valiant leader that paved their chances to victory.

But Yahaba Shigeru didn’t fit in as a clog in that machine. While he wore the #1 jersey with pride, he has yet to prove himself. And if it took Hinata and an out-of- character field trip to reconstruct the trust foundation between him and his teammates, then so be it. 

“Are you having fun?” says Hinata, breaking his train of thoughts.

“Peachy.” He replies.

They spend the last night huddled up in the makeshift log chairs singing around the campfire and exchanging topics that were deemed safe enough for Hinata’s ears as the captain has yet to explain the previous fiasco. As it turned out, Hinata _definitely_ didn’t appreciate his teammates gossiping like old wives about the romantic aspect of his life and that he was not in love with Yahaba nor will they find out who his mystery guy is. They drop it at that as _or else_ was left unspoken but a reminder not to push it. 

Their stories shift from the interesting things they’ve picked up from their home life, deliberately avoiding Mizuki’s ghastly tales, to the reasons why they’ve joined the club. Normally it was a forgotten and unimportant section within the club form as skills and techniques were more valuable than reasons but tonight they indulge in the short moment of vulnerability.

It started with the hellion twins who joined to spite their older brother, Yuda Kaneo, who loved his club more than spending time with them despite being a bench warmer up until his third year. Sora and Tsubasa were obviously gifted with the built and instincts, but they didn’t have the heart like their brother did.

That was until _now_. It fondly reminded Hinata of Tsukishima who thought the club to just be a club, but time and experience can change that easily.

Unbeknownst to him, Hinata changed Yahaba’s perspective too. 

There was Sakai who much like Hinata, who was blessed with natural athletic prowess but felt that he didn’t truly belong to any club, shifting from tennis to soccer and then volleyball. He was glad to announce that he’ll be staying in their club until graduation.

 ~~Dark~~ Mizuki and Himekawa admits to joining the volleyball club because Hinata’s previous games inspired them to but were shocked to find him amongst their ranks. The difference was that Mizuki was glad to meet his hero and play alongside him while Himekawa trained himself to be a setter so that one day he could toss to someone as great as Hinata. Or just to Hinata at least.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you.” The ginger-haired player involuntarily clutched his left knee. “But when I get better, you’ll be the first person I’ll ever spike to!” This instantly reduces the raven head into a stuttering mess, any semblance of his bored expression gone. Hinata truly had a thing for pretty setters.

The most shocking story shared that night was from Minamoto- the tall and quiet reserve pinch server who was suspended from the previous season. Minamoto tells them that he was used to waking up with dread every day with no breakfast or diner on the table but a bill stuck on his refrigerator and a half-hearted _Have A Great Day_ written on a repeatedly used sticky note. His life was _so monotone_ that no one would really care if he showed up for practice or not. And so when he met someone selling a particular zip lock of pills, an unlabeled but safe drug that could help him feel less than the person he already was, he took the opportunity in a blink of an eye.

~~Hinata visibly flinched.~~

“They say it wasn’t any different from narcotics or getting high off a joint but there was _something_ about those pills. It was really addicting.”

“All drugs are.” Watari’s voice was uncharacteristically stern but the reserve pinch server just shook his head. “No, it definitely had something else. I can’t really explain it but it’s like slipping into a dreamless sleep and knowing that six days has passed when you wake up. The best part? You don’t feel dehydrated or hungry. Just… refreshed.”

“…. I know about that too.” Kyoutani’s knuckles were tightly clenched as if it was a memory he had tried to countlessly burn but failed to do so. “My brother- we, don’t really have the best home life either so I turned a blind eye for every fights he was involved in or whenever our mom received a suspension letter from school. I thought it was just a phase, something he'll eventually get over once he finds an outlet of his own, but the last straw was when I caught him trading _candy_ with some kids behind a vending machine.”

“What did you?” Hinata’s whisper was hollowed out by the embers that cackled from the bonfire whereas Kyoutani just shrugged. “Flushed it.”

“I wish I did that, before it was too late. It happened sometime before Miyagi Qualifiers that I didn’t realize I was out for a month. Woke up in the hospital with my parents divorced and Coach Irihata had officially called me off the team.” Minamoto breathes. “For all that’s worth despite the shitty choices I’ve made, I’m glad I still woke up. I’m glad that my parents, even though separated, have taken my mental health seriously as well as being given the second chance to join the club again.” His eyes meet Yahaba’s. “Not everyone’s lucky to have that.”

Immediately the twins sat on his opposite sides, deliberately pushing Himekawa out of his log seat to cuddle with Minamoto. 

The night continued with everyone opening up to the deepest and darkest secrets they’ve felt comfortable enough to share. Watari admits that he doesn’t really know what direction he was headed to after graduation and he was _so scared_ , Kunimi’s and Kindaichi’s regrets to not being able to mend things with Kageyama for abandoning him back in middle school despite what went down on their last match, while Yahaba peels off the band aids of his insecurities that came with being the captain of the team. 

Everyone in the team was already aware of this due to the obvious and continuous change in his demeanor but none invalidated his feelings still. A coal under pressure can either turn into a diamond or ashes. 

When all things were said and done, the team slept with eyes red from the ugly crying but with less burden on their chest. Everyone, except Hinata who decided to sneak out for a walk. And of course, where the sun goes Yahaba followed.

“Had you stolen Minamoto’s ball, then I would’ve left you alone to burn the midnight oil.”

He expected Hinata to scream or stumble in attempt to conjure a poorly scripted lie but was met with misty beryl eyes instead. He was crying. Hell, he had been crying.

“Y-Yahaba-san?”

“Penny for your thoughts?” He takes five long strides before invading Hinata’s personal space. Yahaba holds both his arms down to _ground_ him, one hand with the bottle of pain killers and other with his phone. Oikawa’s name flashed on the screen and Yahaba was glad he had left his second phone in his bag.

This was the first time Hinata tried to call him. Or fake Oikawa for the matter.

“I- I wanted to tell him how I felt.” Hinata by all means had the right to be flustered but the tears in his eyes didn’t make sense. “I know it’s _spontaneous_ and out of nowhere but I feel like it needed to happen now.”

He was obviously looking at Yahaba for support but it wasn’t something the latter could offer, fake Oikawa or not. “I understand that after that wild open-forum you’d feel vulnerable so I suggest that you don’t do it now. Or ever.”

Hinata gasped, and Yahaba kept him tight in his arms. “I think the both of you are good for each other. _Perfect_ even. But Oikawa-san, no matter how you perceive him, is obviously not emotionally available.” For all the respect the setter had for his captain, he still draws the line when it came to Oikawa’s personal affairs. That was his unbiased opinion of him with or without Hinata in the equation. And perhaps _it was time_ to cut Oikawa out of Hinata’s life, fake or not. The reserve libero didn’t need the butterflies in his stomach to improve his performance anymore, especially not after this night where his teammates had a better standing as his support system than the man he thinks is behind the screen of his phone. “You deserve better.” Yahaba finishes and the ginger-haired player sighed in defeat, obviously taking his friend’s words over the current state of his emotions. “So is that all you were sulking about? Jeez, and I thought it was something serious.”

“Like what?”

“Volleyball.”

“…. While I trust my captain to definitely share my woes when it comes to volleyball, I’m quite _doubtful_ when it comes to my love life, considering you’re so inexperienced in such.”

“B-Brat!”

The wind echoes their laughter from the frame of tall trees throughout the vast forest, disappearing into the cold night.

“Seriously though, if anything’s bothering you, you’ll definitely tell me right?”

Hinata was eerily quiet for a moment, fist clenching and unclenching around his pill bottle, before beaming at him. “Definitely.” He promised.

~~Liar.~~

* * *

**_2016, Police Station_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

He thinks about that camping trip- the games they’ve played, the food they ate and the stories they’ve shared up to Hinata’s lie. He thinks what difference would it have made if the ginger-haired player _just told him_ that night, and if that was enough to change the outcome of their current situation.

Yahaba wished they never left camp.

But he also thinks back that maybe that was why it was easier for everyone, regardless of how drunk they were the night of the party, to easily mistake him as Oikawa when he and Hinata left early. Considering that Yahaba was also tall, had broad shoulders and a lanky frame with brown hair. Also very attached to Hinata.

He chuckles darkly. How easy it was to throw Oikawa under the bus in his current situation, but he immediately disregards the thought for Hinata would _never forgive him_ if he let the love of his life take the fall of their actions.

“I know this is a bit hard to believe,” The detective hands him a cup of black coffee to which Yahaba visibly wrinkles his nose in disgust. “since you’re close to him.”

“To Oikawa-san? Not really.” He replies, eyeing the tired man in front of him. It must be hard for the older Sawamura to take on the case of his son’s missing friend to deter them from sleuthing around the forest themselves.

~~Yahaba was truly gratefully for that as it bought him all the time he needed to stall.~~

Detective Sawamura’s phone must’ve been blowing up with countless messages, begging for an update or a lead that he couldn’t afford to say due to legal reasons or possibilities of obstructing the investigation. Yahaba hides his smirk in lieu of drinking. “But I don’t think he’s capable of doing any of this.”

“How so?”

“Well, why would anyone want to kill the person they’ve proposed to that night? Their fiancé?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \--Sora asks what decipher meant to which Tsubasa answer that it’s someone who follows in their master’s teachings.- Tsubasa in this scene mistakes decipher from disciple. 
> 
> Hi hi! And there goes another cliffhanger which is all I'm good for nowadays (Please don't kill me T^T)  
> So apologies for prolonging the should be Oihina and explanation for 2016's staircase incident to the next chapter again but while this could be taken as another filler, the team bonding really needed to happen to put out some hints. 
> 
> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated :D  
> Next update: Sept. 13
> 
> Online classes and student council works for me have begun but I'm definitely game to update on time and finish this story. Stay tuned!


	5. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Or so help me god, I will kill you if I find out you’re engaged before you reach your twenties.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took two nights to write this absolute nightmare of a chapter. Like holy crap, I am so pumped to end this story before my workload gets heavy and heavier.  
> So I’d like to thank you my dearest readers for the encouragement and supports! The comments had especially cheered me up and motivated me to finish this. We are one chapter away from the end!!!  
> Enjoy and Happy reading~ 
> 
> WARNINGS: Mentions of drug use, unbeta-ed, confusing af and author is sleep deprived

**_2013, Spring Interhigh Qualifiers_ **

**_Northern Japan_ **

Yahaba’s grip was tight against the lavatory, head down and hair slicked with the droplets of cold water he had splashed across his face. He wasn’t going to let his crippling anxiety win today nor rely on Hinata’s warmth either.

The Aoba Josai captain will face his demons head on and _win._

All eyes were on Seijoh after the previous qualifiers that ended in cuts and bruised prides. The humiliating disqualification burned hotter than all the previous and consecutive losses they’ve suffered throughout the years. Now it’s not just volleyball anymore, _it’s them_ , the elite Aoba Josai Team, against the best of Miyagi.

“Done with your pep talk?”

“You can be a little shit sometimes, you know that?”

Hinata rolled his eyes before stepping into the comfort room. Despite the confident strides he took, Yahaba was well aware that the reserve libero was as cautious as a stealthy cat due to his unfortunate encounters with the random players who were apparently fated to antagonize him before or after a match.

“Stomach doesn’t hurt?” the captain asks, which by whatever universal effect it had, reminded why Hinata was in the comfort room in first place. In an instant he was reduced from a conniving bastard set out to tease the nervous jitters of his captain to hurling at the nearest available cubicle. 

“Nice to know you came to check up on me!” Yahaba yells from the lavatory to which Hinata, with his head down the toilet, groaned in response.

* * *

It took three hellish sets before they’ve managed to settle the score against a murder of relentless crows.

The last rally had his mind short-circuited in the moment Kunimi’s spike was blocked but their #10 was already behind him in a flash- stance perfected, arms and legs outstretched before he makes a dive at the ball.

Hinata gives him a second chance. Yahaba takes it.

One toss followed by Kyoutani’s powerful spike made all the difference and suddenly the scoreboard was 31-33.

The stadium exploded with a mixture of cheers and groans of defeats but everything was all the same- just white noise to Yahaba’s ears. The cry for their third victory of the week was deafening against the strong beating of his heart.

“-haba-san!” He turns at the sound of his name, only to be met with a flash of orange and to have the air knocked out of his lungs. Yahaba felt the wooden planks against his back and Hinata’s weight on his chest. “We won! We won! We won!” the reserve libero, the chance and the gamble Yahaba took, sobbed against his jersey.

The physical pain of his sore body contradicted the overwhelming joy that threatened to _burst_ and suddenly he was crying, arms wrapped around Hinata’s waist before more bodies turned to join their suffocating hug.

Aoba Josai was going to the finals.

* * *

Yahaba glared at the scene that unfolded before him- Karasuno’s tyrant setter and their prized reserve libero at a hidden corner away from prying eyes ~~, saves for his.~~

For someone who had tasted defeat at the expense of Hinata earlier, the two inanimately chattered without an utter care in the world.

Kageyama’s mouth quirked from a smile to scowl time to time as Hinata explains something to him that awfully sounded about his knee as he points at the mismatch leg warmers he wore. The genius setter looked exasperated, mouthing the word _dumbass_ , before making a grab at a fistful of orange locks. Hinata doesn’t fight it, opting to laugh it off instead.

The fond interaction made Yahaba _incredibly unsettled_ as the green-eyed monster consume his anxiety faster than he made his way to invade their private bubble. “Hinata!” he calls out, ignoring the confused look the reserve libero shot at him. “We’re leaving.”

Tortilla colored eyes clashed with cold cobalt ones. While Yahaba was forced to write six pages long apology letter to Karasuno, he has yet to do it vocally nor does he plans to anyways. Especially when it was Kageyama who punched him across the court first. 

They glared at each other for a good five seconds before huffing in the opposite direction. The captain didn’t even bother to acknowledge Kageyama as he drags Hinata away from him despite his protests. He could feel the ginger-haired player incoherently apologizing and saying his goodbyes under his firm hold. He only stopped when they were at a good distance away from him. 

“What was that about?” Hinata hissed, pushing himself out of Yahaba’s grasp who in turn just stared him down.

“Shouyou.” He opted to use his first name to address the _severity_ of the situation. “Let me give you a piece of advice before I pass on from the club.”

“Did you have to make it out as if you’re going to die-?”

“You can’t keep fraternizing with the enemy. It’ll be hard to build and repair relationships when you keep beating them in matches.” _Or when they beat you_ were left unsaid. But Hinata had the audacity to roll his eyes at him, as if Yahaba was being an overly dramatic captain who can’t stomach a loss or two.

~~He is.~~

“Might I remind you _, Shigeru-san_ , that we weren’t on the same team at first either.”

Yahaba chuckled darkly. “And look where that got us.”

Hinata hums in agreement; the turquoise of his jersey stands out in a sea of volleyball players. “I can see that.”

* * *

The elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club normally spends their meals in a greasy ramen shop under the tight pockets of their coaches. Today however, after the biggest victory so far attained by sweat and blood and tears, the players were set to dine and eat their hearts out on an extremely expensive gourmet meal three blocks from the hotel they were staying in.

But they were also well aware that their club budget had recently faced a big cut due to the consecutive losses and the recent disqualification. It was a questionable feat that could only happen unless they had an unexpected sponsor.

And they did.

Everyone’s jaws drop at the sight of Hinata Akira, a short-statured man in an expensive suit with burnt orange hair mixed with silver and smile that could twinkle in his eyes, who opted to treated them to a high end sushi restaurant. As it turned out, their reserve libero lived _a more comfortable life_ that they’ve assumed.

By comfortable, they meant luxurious.

Hinata on the other hand, paled at the sight of his father but Yahaba too busy having an internalized crisis at the prospect of having to introduce himself as the best friend whom his son loved to sleep over with without making it gay.

The first round of their meal was slightly awkward as Akira-san insisted the teenagers to call him such despite sharing his first name with Kunimi, but his constant showers of praise and obvious interest in how they’ve played their set today had warmed everyone up ~~and healed anyone with prolonging daddy issues~~.

Akira was an enthusiastic chatterbox that it didn’t take long before their shifting discussions fell into a comfortable, casual conversation. Akira asks them about Seijoh, Aoba Josai and how his favorite little tangerine is doing to which everyone just decided to throw Hinata under the bus.

“Well that’s to be expected of my Shou-chan! He had always been a rowdy child so his pain tolerance’s been built up over the years.” Akira laughed at expense of his son’s misfortunate encounters with the ball hitting his face. “I swear if it wasn’t for Hibiki, he’d be wearing dentures before his thirties.” 

Yahaba didn’t think their fathers would’ve met considering it was always Hinata’s mother accompanying him to the clinic. Which made him feel uneasy, especially when their eyes met. 

“Shigeru-kun right? Shou-chan’s talked about you a lot.” He says, deliberately leaving out the part that they’ve never met or had been bothered to be introduced to despite how people perceived them. “I’d like to thank you and your family for _always_ taking care of my son. I always thought he’d have a hard time adjusting after he moved in with me across town.”

Their next meal arrived in ease with beers for the adults and celebratory ice cream for the team. Akira, slightly redder than his hair, slurred embarrassing stories about his quote, _favorite little tangerine_ , while team hollered in laughter. Yahaba expected Hinata to be blushing mess, stuttering on and about as he stops his dad and teammates shenanigans but was met with the ginger-haired player eating his food as if it tasted like ash.

Only then did he think about, if Akira-san was such a delight, then how come Hinata never mentioned him?

* * *

Bellies full and the adrenaline of the day washed out as they rest their sore bodies, the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club slept soundly that night. The next and last game of the qualifiers was set tomorrow- the ultimate revenge match against Shiratorizawa.

It was only understandable that Yahaba couldn’t sleep as a part of him was excited to prove his captaincy once more. And _when they win_ , wouldn’t Nationals be more than just a dream?

The loud sound of the water closet flushing snaps him out of his musings as he sat upright to see recognize that someone else was indeed also awake. It was him, Watari, Kyoutani and Hinata that shared the room ~~that everyone drew straws for~~ with a private bathroom adjoined but the seniors were obviously snoring beds across him. Which could only mean one thing-

“You really have to stop doing that.”

Hinata shrieked, both palms immediately clamped on his lips to avoid waking anyone else up. Even at the most unusual situation, their reserve libero cared more for the others than for himself.

The empty pill bottle rolls across the linoleum floor.

“I-

“Don’t even think about lying, especially when it’s _painfully_ obvious.” Yahaba shuts the door behind him for good measures and to indicate that the bathroom was a safe place. They hadn’t done this in a while- talking about the privy things that bothered them due to their hectic exam schedules and practice for the Spring Qualifiers. Sure the bathroom wasn’t the greenery outside the stadium and should’ve been the last place they could do some talking as it had given Hinata a haunting memory or two, but the four corner room mostly built in linoleum had an odd sense of familiarity to them both – the dental clinic.

The same one that had been providing Hinata with his prescribed medication for his braces as well as the one he had been continuously _flushing down the drain_ for an entire year.

“It’s not what you think.” Hinata pouts. “This is from my physical therapist. I don’t really take them on a daily basis but I’m due for another bottle this month and they only do refills.”

Yahaba sighs in attempt to cool the burning irritation bubbling in the pit of his stomach. “You’re taking them for _a reason_ , you know that right?”

“The side effect messes up my game play.”  
“There won’t be _any more games to play_ if you mess your knee up!”

“It’s just painkillers.” Hinata scoffs. “A-and I don’t like how it makes me feel. I get sick and numb and I just don’t want to deal with that.”

Tortilla colored eyes then softened in understanding. Of course it had something to do with volleyball. “Okay, but we’re going to have to do something about that eventually. Your high pain tolerance won’t always excuse you from not getting the recovery your body needs and deserve.”

“Okay _mom_.” Hinata earns a painful flick on the forehead for the snide comment. Who said setters have soft fingers?

“Speaking of family, why haven’t you introduced me to Akira-san earlier?”

The name itself ignited some sort of dread for the ginger-haired player, a crushing weight that was enough to _ground him_ and buck his knees in fear. Yahaba knew about his mother and Natsu, met them a couple of occasions back in the clinic too, but the absence of his father was something he’d assume to be a sore topic for the jolly family.

Not that the man wasn’t a jolly person himself. 

“It’s complicated.” Hinata says in a whispered voice. “Back when we use to live in the mountains, he worked abroad as a stoke broker. Was never really home, not even for the holidays and birthdays. Heck, he wasn’t even around when Natsu was born.” The captain held his breath, unsure of how to react given that his initial impression of the man who treated them to sushi was actually a workaholic who didn’t bother to involve himself in his family’s life. And that left a bitter taste in his mouth cause boy did Akira-san missed out a lot. 

“Long story short, my parents eventually divorced. Then he came home two years ago without prior notice and suddenly demanding for child custody.” _He obviously won_ , was left unsaid. 

“I think Akira-san is trying to make it up to you.”

Hinata’s laugh was so bitter that Yahaba could almost decipher what he said. ~~You don’t know anything~~. “… maybe, but I wouldn’t think so hard about it. We don’t really get along for other various reasons.”

They drop the topic at that and Yahaba inwardly swore never to bring up the older Hinata ever again. So he switches the topic to Oikawa like the socially constipated person he is.

“Do you guys still talk?” Fake He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had texted Hinata a wink-y faced emoji and a half-hearted _Do your best! I’ll be cheering you on!_ But the ginger-haired player barely responded, and that gave Yahaba a ~~sick~~ sense of satisfaction. Ever since camp, Hinata had avoided conversing with or about Oikawa, obviously taking his advice.

It was an easy exit the captain had planned beforehand when he thought of pretending to be Oikawa for Hinata’s and the entire team’s sake. When the appropriate time came that Hinata was ready to outgrow his schoolboy crush, Yahaba just needed to plant seeds of doubts and let it grow. 

~~It grew.~~

“We do.” Hinata lies. “But my head’s more focus on the game right now. We’ll be facing off Shiratorizawa and BAM! Nationals.”

Yahaba grins. “Nationals. But if I don’t make it, I want you and the rest of the team to. You still have next year after all.”

“Again, why do you have to painfully make it out like you’re dying?”

It was a topic they haven’t fully divulged in yet as neither wanted to accept the reality of their situation that their friendship was on borrowed time. Hinata was younger than him, had more opportunities in court and another year to play whereas Yahaba was going to graduate and leave volleyball behind for a college of his own choice. 

The captain had made peace with his insecurities and could knock a peg down or two when it came to his crippling anxiety but he couldn’t truly say the same for Hinata. Kunimi, Kindaichi, Himekawa, Mizuki, Sora and Tsubasa would have to do better and Yahaba could only count on them should he leave Miyagi. Rather, _when he leaves Miyagi_. 

“Never change, Hinata Shouyou, focus on volleyball and forget about love.” A glimmer of mischief twinkled in his eyes. “Or maybe change your horrible taste in men.”

“H-horrible?!”

“Pretty faced setters with good tosses are too low of a standard, even for you.”

Hinata huffs. “At least _I have_ standards.”

“My point is,” Yahaba pointedly ignores his snarky remark. “while you can befriend anyone within a mile radius, romantic relationships are more complicated than that. Given your history of easy attachment and commitments, you’d probably end up with at least ten boyfriends throughout your high school life.”

“That’s an exaggeration and this is harassment!”

Yahaba hides the bubbling laughter that threatened to escape his lips by feigning a scoff. “Let’s see; there’s the tyrant king and Sugawara-san from Karasuno, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, Kozume-san, Akaashi-san-

“To be fair, _who didn’t_ have a crush on Akaashi-san?”

“Koganegawa from the training camp you shamelessly crashed, the enemy Shirabu-san, the lesser evil of the Miya twins-

“And since when was Osamu-san evil?” 

“-and I’m pretty sure Himekawa’s got it bad for you, considering how I’ve caught him staring at your ass a little bit too long during practice.”

“… That’s creepy and that’s nine, Yahaba-san. You can’t go to college if you can’t do simple math.”

“You are literally _the last person_ who can say that to me.” He roughly ruffles Hinata’s soft, orange locks and the smaller of the two just lets him. “Seriously though, volleyball first and dating second.”

“Unless you approve of them?”

“Unless I approve of them.” Yahaba thinks about it for a moment. “Or so help me god, _I will kill you_ if I find out you’re engaged before you reach your twenties.” 

Hinata’s laughter, sweet and warm like sunshine, echoed throughout the white walls.

* * *

**_2_ ** **_014, Seijoh High_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Losing to Shiratorizawa on his last year in volleyball was a humbling experience.

It was a bittersweet ending for him as Aoba Josai was doomed to keep losing to the eagles. But while he, Kyoutani, Watari and Minamoto won’t be going to Nationals that year, Yahaba _firmly_ believes that Hinata could break that cycle. Their reserve libero was earning a title for himself after all! Hinata had cemented his place within the v-league after their last match, permanently relinquishing his ultimate decoy title, and while his techniques weren’t on Nishinoya nor Yaku’s level yet, he had definitely came up with a few tricks of his own.

Oikawa, wherever he may be, would’ve proposed to him on the spot if he saw how _good_ Hinata looked in the white version of their jersey.

Nevertheless, he was ready to graduate and move on. Yahaba had managed to pave their way to Nationals, now it’s up to his juniors to run towards it.

“Make sure he actually takes them this time.” His father’s stern voice says over the phone. “He just had his braces readjusted this year and hopefully I don’t see any more of his teeth chipped.”

Yahaba rolled his eyes, no matter how much he emphasized that it wasn’t his fault that Hinata took Goshiki’s spike to the face despite scoring them a solid point, his father didn’t take excuses and decidedly put the blame on the older of the two. And so the year ends with Hinata getting a new set of braces when it was supposed to come off.

What would the ginger-haired player do without him?

It was late afternoon and Hinata was caught up with his after-class cleaning duties. Due to the distance of their buildings, Yahaba couldn’t really drop by during the breaks and Hinata would easily get lost finding his classroom due to his poor sense of direction.

Begrudgingly, he sets out to look for the ginger-haired player to give him his new prescribed medicine. Hinata really owed him for this one as it took a lot of convincing his father to change his painkillers. Yahaba needed to secure that even when he’s miles away from Miyagi, Hinata would still take care of himself.

His phone rang once again and he was ready to tell his father off when he recognized the unfamiliar ringtone. It wasn’t from his old phone but the new one he had never used up until now saves for the _Oikawa pretending fiasco._ Which could only mean one thing, why was Hinata calling?

Tortilla colored eyes glared at the name flashing on the screen, hoping Hinata would drop the call but was met with the caller himself instead.

“H-Hinata-kun?”

A flight beneath him was the wide-eyed Hinata, a volleyball on one hand and his phone stuck to his ear on the other. Both stilled with the silence suffocating them until they could hear nothing else but their erratic heartbeats drumming in their ears. 

“I can explain-!”

“You-?! 

Yahaba took a step forward and Hinata backward until the sole of his feet _slipped_.

“SHOUYOU!!!”

In a flash it was just like the road incident all over again except _this time_ his legs didn’t move fast enough nor had there been enough seconds to grab Hinata so he just fell.

He fell.

He fell.

He fell.

HE FELL.

Hinata’s name dies on his lips when hears a sickening _crack!_ He couldn’t move. His breathing stilled. Hinata’s words of comfort were lost, resounding in empty hallways as sentences Yahaba couldn’t make sense of.

For ten steps beneath him were their libero’s soft orange locks drenched in his pool of blood. 

It was only by a miracle that a group of passing students were helping him up on his knees while the others called for an ambulance did he realize the severity of the situation as he faces the consequences of what he’s done.

A simple white lie told over the phone almost ended his friend’s life.

* * *

There were times the setter couldn’t decide what word to use when it came to describing Hinata Shouyou, be it the sun or Icarus. The embodiment of the flaring star suited him in the occasions of how warm he could be as he flashes that smile that could melt the cold ache in their bones. And that was indeed, a fact.

However, there were occasions where he wasn’t the sunshine-incarnate they made him out to be. Sometimes he was just human- ambitious, greedy, frustrated and angry. Sometimes he was Icarus, flying onwards the great heights without fear. 

That day Yahaba was the sun, cruel and heated and callously obliterating everything around him. That day Hinata was Icarus, who blindly trusted him and fell.

* * *

**_2016, Police Station_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

His tired eyes stared at the swirls of the second serving of his black coffee, as if it was the most interesting thing in the room right now.

Yahaba knew he was being watched from the one-way mirror and they weren’t exactly subtle about it. How could they? He had just single-handedly refuted all their allegations against Oikawa Tooru despite the evidence presented to him on hand.

The last person they saw Hinata walk out of the restaurant with? It was Yahaba who was sober enough to accompany him out to the bike trail before coming back to pay for the entire meal. His receipt had the time stamp of his return and the surveillance camera had backed him up. It also showed footage that Oikawa was obviously _too drunk_ to move as he vomits into Hanamaki’s man purse.

He tries to picture the pink-haired man’s reaction when he found out in the morning.

There was Hinata’s blood splattered all over the pavement around a kilometer or two from the restaurant but hidden in plain sight, a pair of his shoe and his broken phone thrown into the forestry then his ruined bike by the cliff. In hindsight, the case could’ve easily been concluded as a terrible hit-and-run accident where the driver may have panicked and tried to dispose of the evidence as fast as he can.

What didn’t make sense was the bloodstained #10 turquoise jersey that had Oikawa’s finger prints all over and the fake suicide letters that followed after his disappearance which indicated that there was a motive.

As the years before were unkind to Yahaba which twisted his shallow character to a valiant captain then the cynical person he was today, he didn’t exactly have all the time to think his actions through. But he still came prepared to gamble tidbits of information in exchange for throwing Oikawa’s scent off the case and redirecting it to him. And it worked _marvelously._

He hides his smirk through the bitter taste of coffee.

His claims were facts after all- that two young, hot-blooded volleyball players may or may not had too much fun in the locker rooms after Hinata had won Nationals, which was a _pretty big deal_ for the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball Club. He knew that Detective Sawamura was also aware of the amorous relationship Hinata had with Oikawa, as the latter’s reaction when Hinata was officially declared missing was genuine _anguish and pain_ that he was willing to take a plane back to Japan and join the search party.

Yahaba couldn’t tell if it was his high-end acting skills or when it was the clarity of the situation that finally dawned to Oikawa, that what happened that night wasn’t a dream. ~~That he was no longer high off his inhibitions and Hinata’s blood showered off in the cold running water indicated that his lover was-~~

Oikawa Tooru loved Hinata Shouyou plenty, sometimes enough for the both of them. Despite the oceans that divided them or all the struggles a transcontinental relationship could offer, their love was nowhere as fickle as a typical romcom movie. It was built on the foundation of trust, rivalry, and the innate ability to bring out the best in each other. It was passionate. Raw. Genuine. Real.

It was perfect.

Yahaba remembers how that night played out-the music he considered noise, the greasy meal shared amongst the previous and current players of the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club up until they had to shoo the minors away before the _real_ party began.

 _“You are the love of my life! My pillar, my support, my heart. You are the sun that shines brightly during my darkest hours.”_ Alcohol has reduced Oikawa into the embodiment of what a shameless but lovesick man was as he gets down on one knee and the restaurant exploded. _“Marry me, Hinata Shouyou.”_

The older man may have quoted poetry in the most drunkenly cliché way possible and fortunately Hinata sunshine-incarnate Shouyou had _willed himself_ not to accept the big diamond ring that probably cost two years of Yahaba’s father’s salary. But he didn’t exactly say no either.

 _“Ask me again when you’re sober.”_ Hinata says instead before planting a soft kiss on Oikawa’s forehead for the public to see.

There were hollers, money exchanged and an abundant amount of pictures taken that night. 

Oikawa may have been too drunk and his misfired proposal to his young lover was publicly turned down but it wasn’t enough to constitute as a motive to have committed a crime of passion. The two lovers had the morning to look forward to after all.

~~Sadly Hinata never got to see the sun rising in Miyagi.~~

Which brings the case back to square one; no motives, no suspects. Just an incomplete picture that the only person who could’ve done this must have held a grudge against Hinata or the entirety of the club to be able to fool them into thinking it was either an accident or suicide.

“You should’ve seen how happy he was that night,” says Yahaba as he reminisces of his friend. “he was only nineteen, had achieved a milestone in Nationals, due to graduate in months and ready to leave Miyagi for Argentina with Oikawa-san yet he-“

A hand clasps his shoulder for support, indicating that his crocodile tears had won Detective Sawamura over. “We’re going to find him, I swear.”

Yahaba sniffs for good measure. He knew the man’s promise was sincere, but also that he’ll ever make good of it.

“I guess we’re going to have to look over the evidences once more. Considering the only suspicious thing we could make out from Hinata’s phone was that Oikawa-san seemed to have used two numbers.”

Yahaba _chokes._

“We were expecting death threats or at least someone harassing him but nothing else out of place. We had the number double checked to make sure it wasn’t the suspect pretending again but the owner of the phone is confirmed to be Oikawa still.”

“Y-yeah.” He wills himself to school his constipated expression. “He became a distant person after graduation and none of his underclassmen had contact with him until Hinata happened. He must’ve switched phones every now and then.” Except Oikawa didn’t.

* * *

**_2016, somewhere in Miyagi Prefecture_ **

**_Cliff side_ **

****

He watches the sunset’s warm colors blend into the vast greenery- the muted orange, salmon pink and soft yellow that slowly faded into the palest shade or purple as the night blankets the sky eased the pain in his hollow heart. It was funny how they have the same sun that set in their horizon despite the distance that divides them yet the one in Miyagi had always felt different.

_Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead._

Yahaba doesn’t turn at the sound of someone walking towards him from behind.

“Watari surprisingly had a good amount of alcohol tolerance to be able to make out who Hinata left with that night.” The footsteps stopped. “Unfortunately he got the wrong brunet.”

He hears a scoff. “Would you rather that I should’ve wiped the footage of you leaving with him to refute your claim?”

“No.” Yahaba turns his head around to stare into his companion’s sharp, cat-like eyes. “In fact _I’m grateful_ about the phone. Only you could’ve hacked into whatever system there was to change the phone’s ownership to Oikawa, but one must wonder _why_.”

Why did he save Oikawa when he knew nothing of the truth? But his companion doesn’t answer, just glared at him throughout his monologue. 

So he continued. “And of course, leave it to Kageyama who was hell bent on proving that I somehow killed Hinata-kun. I must commemorate him for his interrogation skills though, for not only did he managed to make Iwaizumi-senpai fessed up about what happened that night, but he had also managed to get his hands on some information from my previous dealers.” He chuckled darkly. “But I could always play it off as a _harmless senior prank_ _gone wrong_ when I spiked everyone’s alcohol with drugs.” 

“Well, did you then? Did you fucking kill Shouyou?!” 

But Yahaba pointedly ignores him. “And you, you hired a private graphologist to encrypt the letters from my signature on the search party’s log book. How much expensive was it? I’m sure my handwriting skills must’ve cost you fortune at least.”

Kozume Kenma snarled at him, looking like the most feral person alive. “I _never_ understood what he saw in you but since you _kindly_ decided not to throw Oikawa under the bus during that interrogation, I’ll reward you with the smallest chance to redeem yourself.”

“Are you sure that’s wise?”

“You will have the entire v-league community on your trail who wants your head. I need to know what you did to him, from your own mouth and voice, from your own words and perspective, before I fucking hand you to the police.”

All this time Yahaba should’ve noticed that they weren’t building a case against Oikawa but rather against him. Unfortunately all their evidences had gaps and holes that only he could fill.

“Okay.” Kozume was slightly taken aback at his resignation, probably expecting him to put up a fight at least. But Yahaba was _so tired_ of everything. Of the secrets. Of the guilt. Of Miyagi. Of Hinata Shouyou. 

“But first, tell me what you know about the recent _candy_ that’s been all over the news? The one popularly distributed amongst the athletic youth within the back alleys of Miyagi?”

Kozume visibly looked confused. “What does the _mandarine_ have to do with this?”

“Everything.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I reveal everything in the final chapter, I’d like to read your speculations on what the heckie do you think is going on? 
> 
> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated :D  
> Next update: Sept. 13 (Still the same date from when this chapter was originally supposed to be released)


	6. I used to advertise my loyalty and I don’t believe there is a single person I loved that I didn’t eventually betray

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They spend their last sunset together in comfortable silence with the expanse of the greenery stretching long behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI HI HI!!!!  
> You have reached the final chapter of this story. I would like to say thank you all so so so much for everything- the reads, the comments, and the kudos.  
> ❤❤❤Happy Reading and Enjoy❤❤❤
> 
> WARNINGS: Inaccurate description of illegal drugs, child abuse, unbeta'd, author sleep-deprived af

**_2014, Tohoku University Hospital_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Yahaba chuckled darkly at the expense of his _unbelievable luck_. How convenient was his situation right now whereas Hinata survived the accident without a single memory of what happened in that staircase due to partial amnesia.

He forgot.

He deliberately forgot the short realization that his captain, his best friend _, had_ _fucking manipulated_ in pretending to be his crush for an entire year, supporting him to shift from Karasuno’s middle blocker to Aoba Josai’s libero for his own benefits. The guilt Yahaba never thought existed surfaced with vengeance, gnawing his conscience faster than the anxiety that once drowned him in a pit of suffocating darkness.

Yahaba, who had gambled his friendship with Hinata and Oikawa’s trust in exchange for a chance at Nationals, a chance at _fucking volleyball,_ made his friend so still-shocked from the betrayal that when the truth came crashing down his body followed.

He shuddered at the memory. There was so much blood everywhere- from the pristine floor and Hinata’s blazer to his taped fingers as he held onto his friend all throughout the way to the hospital.

In the art of manipulation, the liar is not allowed to have a guilty conscience. For the moment he starts doubting himself, everything he has slowly built will come crumbling down fast. But seeing the flash of Hinata’s mix confusion, hurt and betrayed expression before he fell _consumed_ the entirety of Yahaba’s person. He burned, _~~burned, burned, burned~~_ and for once in his life he didn’t mind the pain inflicted by the scourging fire, instead, hoped it would hurt enough to absolve him of his wrongdoings.

“Yahaba-kun, right?” the minor surgery only took four hours at most but it was the longest wait in his life. Surprisingly, the captain was second to Hinata’s emergency contact despite the nonexistent familial relationship between them which prompted him to stay while the rest of the Aoba Josai team who ran to the hospital in a drop of hat had to go.

Yahaba didn’t know if he should be overwhelmed with joy or cry. “He’s in stable condition for now but-

“He doesn’t remember much, I know.” He grits his teeth.

“Actually, it’s more than that. You said he’s actively engaged in sport, right?”

“Volleyball.”

“Right. But you see, there were a lot of injuries we found that aren’t exactly _volleyball related_. He has a litter of bruises around his back and some bone fractures that weren’t mended properly.”

Yahaba’s eyebrows quirked in confusion. “He has a medical history with his left knee from overworking.”

“Is that really the cause of it?”

 _Is it?_ His mind echoed. He was well-aware that the ginger-haired player was an extremely clumsy person, be it in or off court. And that it would be completely out of character for Hinata not to show up with a band aid on his arm or a salon pass callously stuck to his cheek. “With all due respect _sir,_ cuts and bruises are a given and a norm to every sports out there so if you think my team’s involved in some kind of hazing-’’ Yahaba who was the tallest amongst his peers had no problem looming over the old doctor. “-I’d choose my next words carefully if I were you.”

“I-I wasn’t thinking it like that!” a lie. “But there are also suspicious traces in his bloodstream that resembles the components of-

 _“Shigeru-kun.”_ Yahaba felt a cold hand on his shoulder, commanding him _to sit and stand down._ Behind him was Akira-san, fashionably late in his red designer suit. The twinkle in his eyes was as unnerving as the doctor who paled on the spot while Akira-san _dared_ him to continue. “I’ll take it from here. You should go home and wash up.”

“But-

“No excuses.” Akira-san tut, flashing a toothy smile in attempt to calm him down. ~~It didn’t work.~~ “I doubt Shou-chan is in any condition to see you in this state anyways. Both of you should rest and then you can visit tomorrow.” He turns his ~~predatory~~ gaze towards the doctor and _grounds him_ there. “Besides, I’d also like to have a word with you in private, sensei. I’m his father, you see. And I don’t appreciate you telling off things that should only be between families.”

* * *

Yahaba doesn’t visit the next day though. Or the next. And the next. He just holed up in the darkest corner of his room with a blanket draped over his grimy hair as tired, tortilla-colored eyes hovered over the bright screen of his second phone.

He knew he was worrying everyone- his parents who fortunately understood his situation, the teachers who probably misses the only student who doesn’t snore in their class and the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club who didn’t really need their captain’s presence anymore considering the year’s season has officially ended. Overall, everyone was considerate enough to give Yahaba, who was probably trying to get over the shock of his friend’s accident, some space. 

What they didn’t know was that there was more to it. More than the shock, more than the scare of _almost_ permanently losing Hinata, more than threatening the doctor who was just doing his job, more than the guilt, more than the remorse-

**Hinata Shouyou. 7: 11 am.**

-How is it that I can oversleep and miss the first period of my class but is always the first to arrive in the gym for practice? 

**Hinata Shouyou. 13: 45 pm.**

-You really need to teach me that killer serve of yours. I know that liberos don’t really need to but I’ve always wanted to at least score a service ace before. So I can rub it in Kageyama’s smug face! Ah, but don’t tell Yahaba-san. He’ll definitely kill me.

**Hinata Shouyou. 18: 11 pm.**

-ARGHHHHH!!!! How do you put up with the weekly knee therapy? Is it supposed to hurt this much? I swear I almost couldn’t walk to practice the next day after the first session. 

**Hinata Shouyou. 22: 18 pm.**

-Have a goodnight, Oikawa-san.

**Hinata Shouyou. 10: 18 am.**

-I want to stand on the same stage as you someday but is it too bold of me to say beside you?

**Hinata Shouyou. 02: 00 am**

-It’s not funny! Some god is out there to get me, laughing whenever I have to walk in a life-threatening situation in the bathroom of all places. And need I remind you that you threatened to bury me alive with Iwaizumi-senpai before?

**Hinata Shouyou. 11: 41 am**

-If Kageyama’s a king and you were his mentor, then that’d definitely make you the Grand King.

**Hinata Shouyou. 17: 34 pm**

-I wish you were here.

Yahaba really screwed up. It wasn’t just a fleeting school boy crush or a means of inspiring Hinata to make a better version of himself as Aoba Josai’s new libero but a relationship he had intended to build with Oikawa, with or without volleyball. And who was he to play mismatch-maker about Hinata’s love life when he doesn’t know the first thing about love anyways? 

But the damage was done and Yahaba will have to live with the consequences. He didn’t know why Hinata wanted to call Oikawa that time, nor will he ever know as the reserve libero may have forgotten anyways. And it would be nice if he forgot Yahaba too.

* * *

Eight days later and Kyoutani had enough of his ~~bullshit~~ sulking as he barges straight into his room unannounced. On another day, Yahaba would’ve blown his head off because _only Hinata_ was allowed up in his room and Kyoutani, despite having known him longer and is his official partner in court, was no exception. Today though, he was as tired as the first time he dragged his feet off the hospital.

“Get up. He wants to see you.” The blond snarled, visibly disgusted at their captain’s pitiful state which was _the last thing_ Yahaba would ever want to see from the wing spiker who wears eye liner on a daily basis. Kyoutani had to drag him off his bed to take a cold shower, _exaggeratingly_ waited for him in the bathroom with only a shower screen separating them before throwing him anything decent he could find from Yahaba’s closet.

Which brings them to the present outside Room 101, Hinata’s ward.

The wing spiker then left him in his mismatched pink and white socks and oversize yellow sweater while holding a basketful of meat buns. Leave it to Kyoutani to play hero for Hinata’s convenience without taking Yahaba’s feelings into account. But he just sighed in defeat, still exhausted to fight back. Yahaba might as well get this over with as it’d be suspicious if he continues refusing to visit Hinata. And he’d be damned if people would start assuming he’d somehow push his friend off the stairs, which was crazy because the last thing he ever wanted to do was to hurt Hinata.

He then exhales his anxiousness away to mentally steel himself when he meets Hinata, as well as to explain his absence with whatever reasonable lie he could conjure on the spot.

From the other side of the door, Yahaba could hear the reserve libero’s laughter. Not the loud bellowing one he was so used to that could either make him want to bleach his ears, plant earplugs in it or laugh along with, but _soft._ As if Hinata was flustered. He then slowly opens the door, expecting to see Hinata-san or Natsu, maybe Akira-san if he wasn’t lucky, Kageyama if the gods hated him that he’d take their obnoxious freshmen any time of the day but instead, tired tortilla-colored eyes clashed with sharp brown ones. 

“Hi hi, Yahaba-kun! I see that you’ve been doing well.” He’s taller now, dark brown hair cropped and his muscle built improved but the toothy grin was all the same. “I’ve heard a lot of _interesting things_ from Chibi-chan here. Though I must commend you for stealing Karasuno’s #10.”

Hinata was red, torn between sputtering for the Grand King to _shut up_ and apologizing to Yahaba on his behalf.

“Oikawa-san.” He schooled his expression to match his ex-captain. “Fancy meeting you here.” 

Come Monday and Yahaba was going to _murder_ his teammates and that’s the last thing they were going to remember of his captaincy. 

* * *

“I won’t say anything to him, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Yahaba was not in the right mind at the moment and Oikawa _mercilessly_ exploits that vulnerability. They sit a chair distance apart just outside the hospital benches because the older of the two definitely deserved an explanation to how _he_ had been texting Hinata all year long without knowing.

“Thanks.” Yahaba replies but still unable to look up from the ground. Oikawa loudly sighs next to him, obviously not appreciating his gloomy mood when he had been so _generous_ to forgive him for the slander. “You did what you had to do.” Yahaba’s fists clenched, knuckles white and visibly shaking in anger. “What any captain would in their place.”

He abruptly stood up. “Is this why you chose me? Because I’m a _shallow_ , _despicable_ and _self-loathing_ person who was willing to manipulate the only friend he ever had for a chance to win at fucking volleyball?!” he sobs, letting all the ugly emotions he had kept since Hinata’s fall. All the pain and guilt as he unabashedly crumbles in front of the valiant captain he once looked up to. “Hinata got hurt! If only I-

“-gave him my number in the first place, then maybe we could’ve avoided this web of lies.” Oikawa shrugs. “What? I’m sure you’re rather aware of my unfortunate pinning for the shrimp.”

“B-but we lost to them on your final year.”

“I’m not _that petty_. There’s always going to be two sides in volleyball- the geniuses or the naturally-gifted ones and the hard workers, the winners and the losers. You’d have to learn to survive all the unfairness life has to offer or let it consume you. Which makes me glad you didn’t let the latter happen.” Oikawa eventually gets up, no doubt wanting to return to Hinata’s side as he was running short of his time in Japan while Yahaba still had plenty. “I chose _you_ because I knew you’d understand better than anyone else.”

Yahaba chokes.

“And I doubt Hinata wouldn’t have found his way to Seijoh still. You shouldn’t underestimate how big his love for volleyball is, what he’d give to play. A complete monster.” Oikawa gives a knowing smile, one that Yahaba was oddly familiar with. “But that doesn’t mean I’ll let this underhanded method go without certain consequences. ‘Cause if I do, you won’t learn from this experience. So I reckon that you’ll have to tell him eventually.”

“… He’ll hate me.”

“Then you’ll have to live with that.”

* * *

**_2015, Seijoh High Graduation_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Yahaba Shigeru graduates from Seijoh High ranking a good number of 18th on the honour rolls and the nth captain of the elite Aoba Josai Volleyball club who ~~got them disqualified on their first district game~~ led them to the Semi-finals of the Spring Qualifiers. He passes his jersey to Kunimi Akira, who accepts it like the heaviest burden he ever took on his athletic life.

It was. 

The anti-climactic farewell much like the previous year filled with tears, goodbyes and no regrets. Well, save for two on his part.

One. Hinata and Oikawa are officially dating. It barely took one year of courting and while most were spent on the other side of a screen as it was revealed that the older of the two was training to go pro in Argentina, their feelings still connected. They’ve proved that love knows no bounds and that no amount of distance, oceans and difference in time zones could stop them from wanting to be together.

And so some holidays and birthdays later, they share their first kiss under the cold winter.

Hinata was initially _frightened_ to tell Yahaba, considering that he promised no more pretty setters in his life and volleyball should come first but the latter agreed that they’ve wasted too much time with their ridiculous pining for one another. And if it took Hinata sunshine-incarnate to quell the darkness in Oikawa’s mind and Oikawa to bring the light back into Hinata’s eyes then who was Yahaba to stop them?

Besides, he was _truly_ happy for them, and he lets it known by threatening Oikawa that _if he ever thinks_ about hurting the ginger-haired player then he’d be sleeping with one eye open for the rest of his life. And even though the older brunet had more advantage over Yahaba’s head ~~and was physically stronger too,~~ Oikawa complies and promises never to.

Which brings him to case two- the eventuality that he’ll have to tell Hinata everything.

Even though their beginnings didn’t really involve a plan to snatch Karasuno’s #10 under their wing, it still led to that ending. Yahaba wanted to be his friend, _became his best friend,_ but the underlying motive of having him by his side for the sake of volleyball was not something that could be left unaddressed.

And so Hinata sobs into his uniform, snot-faced and fat tears rolling down his cheeks as he hugs the daylights out of Yahaba in the empty corner of the gym’s storage room. The older of the two resigns to the bone-crushing hug as he awkwardly pats Hinata’s back for comfort. If anyone could see them right now, they’d mistake them as having an affair and another unresolved issue is the last thing Yahaba needed. Especially not when he leaves Miyagi for Kyushu University where the distance was enough to separate him from Hinata should the ginger-haired player refuse to ever see him again.

“Give me your second button.” Hinata demands to which Yahaba refutes by giving him a light head chop. “ _No_. You have an insanely jealous boyfriend who will hound my ass from Argentina to Fukuoka just because he can.”

The eighteen hours and eight minutes distance was a sore reminder for Hinata that it makes him _wail louder_ while the older of the two was certain his waist was going to bruise. “Shouyou-kun,” he says with a fond tone, too familiar for someone who will break Hinata’s heart. “I’ll always be home for the semester breaks, mom made clear of that. And if we’re lucky, I’ll be there to watch all of your games.”

“All of it?”

“Well, save for the practice matches. Unlike you, I don’t go gate crashing training camps just because. And there’s always a video recording for that.”

Hinata sniffs and basks in the reassurance, which was the untimely cue for Yahaba to fess up on the kind of human garbage he was. “I need to tell you something though, and you don’t have to forgive me-

“Shigeru-san,” the reserve libero cuts him off. “I have something to tell you too. I wasn’t completely honest with my transfer, my knee injury or my family for the matter. I’m sorry I’ve been lying to you this whole time but I feel like this is the right and only time to tell you before everything might go south.” 

Wait what?

Yahaba numbly nods, for Hinata was a _terrible liar_ so what was he hiding that made him good at it?

* * *

Yahaba vomits all over the toilet, uncaring that some residues of his bile spills on the floor as his hands tightly clutch the ends of the water closet. Hinata hurriedly follows, rubbing slow circles on his back as he whisper words of comfort that unfortunately fell deaf to his ears.

All this time. All this fucking time Hinata was living under the same roof with that- _that monster!_ A foreign stoke broker from Wall Street who no doubt rose to the corner office not only by distributing the illegal yet typical goods underneath his sales but created a batch of new ones too.

And what kind of father would Hinata Akira be if he hadn’t tried the prototypes on his son first let alone _share_ his success with him?

His first and proud invention was the honey-eyed citrus- a ~~piss~~ yellow colored syringe that poorly functions like an Epinephrine shot. Known to jump start and get the user’s blood heated, boiling and pumped under the pretense that its components were mixed at safe amount. It’s not.

The second was the lemon salts, easily smuggled and sold in between the bath and soap stores. Again, a poorly-made counterfeit and substitute for cocaine but was popularly used amongst the underground bars as it was spiked amongst the unknowing drinkers who were inexperienced with the bittersweet taste of gin. 

The third and most successful ones were the orange colored pills _, the tangerine._ It took him six years to produce this component, a mixture of narcotics and MDMA with a touch of hallucinogens. The initial body’s reaction was to go into a dreamless state of sleep and wake up refreshed. Which all the more made it addicting but insanely dangerous as one pill turns to two and two to eight, easing the body’s pulse to the point of no return.

Altogether, they were called the _mandarinovyy nabor_ or _mandarine_ for short _._ Lovingly named after his guinea pig. Yahaba knew this because his father had thoroughly lectured him from the rumours he had heard over a grapevine. Unfortunately he was more focused on his captaincy than vices that didn’t really had anything to do with him.

Except it did. 

Ever the business man, Akira-san leaves for New York to expand his success starting with the sleepy town of Miyagi. He targeted the young and pressured students and athletes that were under _so much stress_ that they’d turn the other cheek for a little bit of fun with little consequences of their bodies to suffer. And knowing Hinata was involved in the _mandarine_ business explained everything- why Hinata had chipped molars and lasting bruises that couldn’t have been caused by the intense volleyball practice, why he was so reluctant _and scared_ to take pain killers for he was afraid that he would feel so numb he’d never wake up, why he waits for everyone to leave the lockers and shower at home instead, why he preferred Yahaba’s home over his, why Minamoto and Kyoutani's story by the camp fire made him guilty.

Why.

Why.

Why.

WHY???!

While Yahaba slept with ease, Hinata had taken a sledgehammer to his left knee and was locked into his room for three days until he gave in and pops the tangerine pills. While Yahaba ate his warm meals in a table of three, Hinata had to double check that his food wasn’t laced with anything funny. While Yahaba’s fingers bled from overworking his sets, Hinata’s father beats him on a daily basis-

Yahaba _retches_ and Hinata holds him. “I’m sorry.” He says. “I didn’t tell you this to make you feel responsible or to make you stay, I just-” The ginger-haired player hiccups. “Do you remember that night, in the middle of the road where people barely passed and the street lights were never lit?”

“M-my shortcut?”

Hinata softly chuckles. “ _Your shortcut_. Earlier that day, I found out that my old man had already sent his first shipment due for Sendai and _I stupidly tried_ to stop him. I got a hold of some _mandarine_ parcel and tried to bury it in the backyard but he, he caught me red handed and decided to punish me by aggravating my injury.” His laugh turned bitter as his hand clutches on his left knee, feeling the incident’s phantom pain. “I still had to go to practice though, for I’ve already missed out too much and everyone was getting suspicious. Probably thought I still blamed myself for what happened at Nationals. A-and he let me go, but gave me a pill bottle of tangerine too.”

“That motherfucker-!”

“I didn’t take it though. I refused to. Because despite the agonizing pain, if I gave in then that means he wins right?” Hinata’s form slide next to Yahaba’s crumbled one. “Unfortunately, I got caught again and by Tsukishima of all people! He thought I was taking the tangerine pills on purpose and when confronted, I ran. I ran because I couldn’t explain it to him, nor do I expect him to understand.” 

Yahaba knew that telling anyone would’ve been a death sentence to both Hinata and the other party. Akira-san had set that example with Hinata’s doctor to when he fell down the stairs a year ago, on how _conveniently_ did the attending surgeon died of a heart attack just after Hinata was discharged. Back then Yahaba didn’t think much of it but hearing Akira-san’s ugliest side made it a possibility. 

“And so that night,” he repeats, jewelled beryl eyes misty and mismatched from the smile on his lips. “ _I wanted to die_. I was ready to but you saved me and you gave me hope. You gave me a blank slate to start over with and I may have gotten a little bit greedy. I got to play volleyball again and Tooru-

“Wait, does he know? Does anyone?”

Hinata shakes his head. “Mom and Natsu had a feeling but I didn’t have the heart to tell them since we’re still financially dependent on him. I almost told Kageyama but he went to that Youth Training Camp and Tsukishima, no matter what little amount of concern he has for me, was too risky. Though he probably had a little idea of what’s going on.” Unknowingly that was a knife to Yahaba’s chest, as he had never really noticed anything strange for the two years they’ve spent together while Karasuno’s talented middle blocker manage to deduce _something_ from one occurrence. “I wanted to tell Tooru but my old man has beaten me to it, offering to do some sponsorship for him in Argentina and, _god_ if you’ve seen the look on his face. He had stars in his eyes!”

For the many things Hinata Shouyou was, cruel wasn’t. Yahaba knew Oikawa didn’t really have trouble acquiring sponsors abroad but the pro setter was probably ecstatic to know he was getting on his boyfriend’s father’s good side and was determined to make sure it stays that way.

The two then cleans up and straightened their uniforms for they still had a celebratory meal with the Yahaba family to attend to followed by the party organized by the club juniors. “But don’t misunderstand. I didn’t tell you this to burden you, but to _thank you_. I don’t know how I’ll cope when you’re gone but I think I’ll manage.”

Hinata’s fake smile sends Yahaba to the edge, immediately replacing the nausea with anger. If this was punishment, if this was the consequences he had to face for lying to the most genuine person he ever knew-

“I’ll save you.” He says, pulling Hinata close to his body with an arm on his waist and the other on the back of his head. “I swear, _I’ll definitely save you.”_

-then so be it.

* * *

**_2016, The Night After Spring Nationals_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Northern Japan_ **

Pride swells in Yahaba’s chest as he recounts the earlier events of the day.

“Did you see that? They call it the queen’s touch!”  
A bristle. “To think they had a player like him in their team all along.”

The Spring Nationals of 2016 was won by Miyagi’s underdog- The elite Aoba Josai Volleyball team. It was an acquired and desirable timing when Shiratorizawa’s menace of an ace graduated two years ago followed by his prodigy to which Kunimi had devised a plan to take advantage of the situation. The entire Miyagi Prefecture’s balance fell apart and suddenly all the teams were a powerhouse vying for the top. Aoba Josai, for the many years they had fallen was determined to tip it in their favor. 

And they won.

After decades of grueling losses, Aoba Josai of Miyagi Prefecture takes the Spring Nationals by a storm with the most notable ~~hellion~~ Yuda twins, taking on Hinata’s previous title as the ultimate decoys and the new freak quick pair. The latter on the other hand, had earned a name for himself as _the Queen_ \- akin to a chess piece with unrivalled speed and monster reflexes as he wreaks havoc on both sides of the court. 

For someone who couldn’t even receive properly up to the second half of his freshmen year, Hinata Shouyou ranks 25th amongst the best liberos in Japan within the secondary division. ~~Even when they call him an incredibly endearing name-~~

Oikawa, who took an economic flight to surprise his boyfriend on the biggest and last match of his high school life, sprinted across the court after the scoreboard announced their win. He scoops the libero off the ground, takes him for a spin and _kisses him_ full on the lips. The cheers fell deaf to their ears and the bouquet of sunflowers lay forgotten on the floor. Hinata visibly winced in pain, teeth clashing on his braces but he lets Oikawa have his way with him in the lockers. 

This was their last time together after all.

Yahaba personally escorts Hinata back to his house in Miyagi, taking in the sight at the luxurious threshold before they take the small, hidden luggage under the cupboards and make their way to the party’s venue via bike. And while Yahaba still abhors the thing and his too long legs drapes across the ground as Hinata peddles away, it wasn’t such a bad experience. 

They spend their last sunset together in comfortable silence with the expanse of the greenery stretching long behind them.

The party was held in a resto-bar by the outskirts of Miyagi and they celebrate their win by maxing out Akira-san’s credit card. They eat, they laugh, they dance and Oikawa drunkenly proposes.

For a moment Yahaba thinks that the ginger-haired player would falter, accept the diamond and throw their year-long plan overboard. But Hinata’s resolved was stronger than the overwhelming feelings of love and faux security. So he lies, just like how Yahaba taught him to, because he didn’t need lose ends to where he was going. 

It took a whole year of walking around eggshells, scheming and calculating their movements before it was finally set in motion- The Disappearance and Death of Hinata Shouyou. For Yahaba knew that the police wouldn’t be able to take the kingpin of the _mandarine_ drug rush down but he’d be damned if he was going to let Hinata be dragged with it. And what better way to cut off connection with the embodiment of human garbage named Hinata Akira than the death itself?

The plan was simple but phased in a very complicated manner- on the eve of their party after Spring Nationals, Yahaba will spike everyone’s alcohol with a careful amount of crushed tangerine pills just enough to get them high and distracted when he and Hinata makes their escape.

By 22:15 pm, the ginger-haired player will board the last bus to the town square and take the train to Tokyo. Hinata was expected to stay in a motel for a week at most to get his braces out and dye his hair before taking the first flight off to Brazil. Yahaba on the other hand will take his dented bike a kilometer or two at the opposite and barely passed route from the restaurant. From there he will pour a generous amount of Hinata’s collected blood pint across the pavements and throw a few of his things off the road to make it look like a hit-and-run and a poor attempt of hiding the evidence.

It was perfect but crazy. Absolutely, purely and wildly crazy that Hinata had to check if Yahaba was sick in the head when he proposed faking his death. But the trust built between the two was too strong for Hinata to start doubting him now. And so they plotted, despite the hectic college life Yahaba had yet to get fully adjusted with as well as Hinata’s club activities, they managed to persevere and push through the deadline which was Spring Nationals- the best way to disappear under the radar.

Hinata, being the straight D-grade student he was, fortunately had ample time to learn Portuguese while Yahaba went off to six different dealers. Each purchase was a light on his conscience knowing it won’t fall into the hands of other kids. Kids like Minamoto or Kyoutani’s younger brother.

The night went off accordingly as they slip away from the rowdy group, unbeknownst that Watari had his eyes on them. They part at the road's intersection, with Hinata nodding one last thanks to him. Yahaba couldn’t really put his feelings into words at that moment as Hinata’s retreating form leaves him hollow and emptier so he lets his body decide by embracing him from behind just for _five more minutes._

“Speak from the gut. Clear your mind. Drown out all the unnecessary noise and find comfort in your heartbeats instead.” Yahaba whispers, drowning the incoherent and sputtering of the shorter body pressed against his. Hinata then goes lax, cranes his neck and smiles.

“Don’t forget me.” Hinata says before disappearing into the night. 

After planting the evidence, Yahaba returns to the restaurant to pay for everyone’s meal and stayed for the next three hours until everyone was sober and safe to drive home. He was going to sleep with ease tonight.

* * *

“Huh? Where’s Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-senpai?” tortilla colored eyes darted in panic at the absence of Iwaizumi’s car. They were all supposed to leave together, away from the road where Hinata’s supposed remains were.

“Oh they went for a drive.” Hanamaki replies as he flings the passed out Matsukawa on his shoulder. “Iwaizumi really needed to straighten him up, proposing like that out of the blue- oi Yahaba?!”

Yahaba runs. And that’s where the plan went south.

* * *

**_2016, present day_ **

**_Miyagi Prefecture, Cliff side_ **

“If it’s any consolation, they were both extremely suspicious and wary of me.” Yahaba laughs for not long ago he feared his upperclassmen, at Oikawa’s snake-like charisma and Iwaizumi’s monstrous strength yet that night made them scared of _him._ “In hindsight I did take advantage of their slightly lucid state, as the _tangerine_ doesn’t burn off quickly for the next ten to thirteen hours at least.”

Kozume remains quiet behind him, clearly processing that Hinata’s father was a drug lord in Miyagi and had been physically and emotionally abusing his own son-He tries not to vomit at horrendous picture.

“They obviously wanted to go to the police at first but the drugs in their system and the blood on the car tires would immediately mark them as suspects.”

“So you manipulated them into destroying the evidence?”

“Unfortunately. I told them that Oikawa would lose all chances of going pro while Iwaizumi could face a long time in jail before he could ever think of taking a step back into his university campus. Not that they’d care of course but throw Hinata’s name in the mix and we’re flinging his bike and jersey off the cliff.” Yahaba turns to face Kozume fully, looming over him with his tired dead eyes and the bitter smile etched on his lips. “The letters were a last minute improvisation on my part.”

“This is crazy.”

A snort. “Crazy.”

A moment of silence encompasses between them as Kozume reels at the truth while Yahaba sighs in mock relief, finally having someone to share his burden with.

“Then Shoyou’s alive. He’s _alive_ and he’s out there but w-where is he right now? Did he get to Brazil safely and un-followed?”

And that was the third source of Yahaba’s misery. He would’ve continued the ruse for no matter how long it takes just to guarantee his friend’s safety, even when they didn’t have any long term plan on what happens next when Hinata arrives at his destination for they were more focused on getting him out of the current hellhole first but-

“When Shouyou-kun decided to fly across the continent, I told him to remember three important things to survive- to trust absolutely no one but himself, never to stay long in one place and no lose ends. So I should’ve known that he was planning to cut me off too.”

“What-?”

“Because the thing is, Hinata Shouyou _never_ made it to Brazil. Never intended to anyways.”

**END OF PART 1**

**PREVIEW FOR WHERE THE ANGELS USED TO BE**

He jolts at the softest tap on his shoulder, melting the sleepy expression off his face that goes from dread to as equally surprised as the flight attendant who woke him. It was evident that he was still experiencing paranoia, given that he was going to live looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life.

“Sir,” she says in the perfect English accent. “We have arrived.”

“ _Spasiba_.” Hinata grins, showing his prefect pearly white teeth as the smile twinkles in his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> END OF PART 1 XD  
> Now we know why Hinata left, but can anyone guess where he went?
> 
> SO BANZAIIII!!!! I really enjoyed writing this fic, albeit the final chapter was an absolute monster. I hope I made sense of every cliffhangers I wrote, and that it had enough Yahaba&Hinata bromance as well as OikawaxHinata scenes.  
> Since I'm still adjusting to my new sched and workload, I still don't have a specific date to when I'll release the sequel but for now I'd like to work on some of my side projects.
> 
> Again, thank you for reading ❤


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